Writing Sex Toy Reviews Or “Messing Around On The Internet And Getting Free Sex Toys”
  • Posted

Writing Sex Toy Reviews Or “Messing Around On The Internet And Getting Free Sex Toys”

This is an article I wrote for KinkCraft in the past

In general, most people that I have talked to think that sex toy reviewers provide a useful service as let’s face it the number of different options when choosing a sex toy is mind blowing. So it can be very useful to read quality reviews to see both the good and bad points about a product before parting with your hard earned cash.

The two key words in that last paragraph are “quality reviews”. There’s a huge difference between a quality review and something that has been quickly thrown together telling you about a sex toy, often just regurgitating the blurb from the packaging or manufacturers website. That doesn’t do anyone any justice at all and it certainly doesn’t help a potential buyer make an informed choice.

Recently there has been a huge boom in the number of people writing sex toy reviews and some of them are very good but conversely some of them are very bad. This growth in the sector is probably due to the big misconception out there that reviewing sex toys is messing around on the internet and that it must be great to get sex toys for nothing.

This misunderstanding is really quite understandable as from the outside it looks like the perfect job – “You just get free sex toys and just spend all day masturbating”. Whilst his sounds ideal there is a lot more to it than that and a lot of it isn’t glamorous at all and actually a lot of hard work.

Yes, companies do send me products to review for “free” but they are hardly freebies. When I agree to review a product a contract is formed and I am legally bound to provide an informative review within a set timeframe. I am being paid in materials rather than cash for my opinions and writing skills. But it’s still getting sex toys for free I hear you cry.

Yes, it is “free”, but let me show you what writing a quality sex toy review entails.

I start by looking at the materials used in the sex toy to see if anything is not body safe, yes I have had to learn a bit of chemistry. I know what Parabens and Phthalates are, these are two very dodgy chemicals often used in poorer quality products.

I have a small studio set up at home and when a product arrives the first thing I do with it is photograph the toy and its packaging, this process alone can take an hour or two as once the pictures are taken I then optimise them in various pieces of software to ensure they look good.

I then study the toy on the bench noting such things as how the material reacts to lube and dust. I evaluate the instructions provided and learn how to use the toy on the bench. I make notes, lots of notes at this stage, how noisy is it, how strong are the vibrations, are they localised or throughout the toy.

The first time I use the toy I just get myself off it, no notes or anything I just want to enjoy it for what it is. During the process of writing a review I will generally use it at least ten times and each time after the first I will have a notepad and pen next to the bed and I will jot down notes both in use and afterwards whilst my thoughts are fresh in my mind. This is the main reason why my reviews usually take about three to four weeks to write.

During these sessions I am not just masturbating, I am focussing on the sensations, characteristics and various settings, it does take the fun out of it but it has to be done that way. You can’t just use a toy once and write a review on it, there are so many variables that can affect how you perceive its performance from how tired you are to what time of the month it is or if you are stressed. Using it as many times as I do allow me to average all of these things out and to get a good feel for the toy.

Luckily I am usually reviewing more than one product at a time so I can alternate toys otherwise it would soon get very boring indeed. Coffee is very good for the next part of the process, it’s essential in fact.

Next it’s on to actually writing the review, mine tend to go on a bit as I try to get as much into them as I can. Once it’s written it’s then on to selecting and inserting images pertinent to the various sections of the review, these need to be formatted and uploaded onto the websites server. I write my reviews in html so I have full control of the layout of the page that way, that was self-taught.

It’s important in reviews to state both the good and bad points about a toy or product. I know that if I don’t like something, someone else may love it and so a review has to explain why something didn’t work for me so that readers can make an informed view of the product.

Once the review is written, and uploaded onto the server I then start the process of editing the review online, reading it over and over again correcting spelling mistakes and changing it so that it flows more naturally.

I then publish the review and notify the company that provided the product so that they can see it. They have no say in how I write my reviews and so it is only at this point that they actually get to read it as well.

Then it’s on to promoting both the review and the product on social media.

This whole process takes a huge amount of time and if I was to break it down into an hourly rate it would be way, way below the national minimum wage. Yes, I get the product for free and sometimes earn a small commission if someone uses one of my affiliate links to buy a product, but it certainly isn’t a huge amount but it does cover my expenses.

This is my reviewing process
This is my reviewing process and it shows rough timelines

I love writing reviews but unless you are one of the huge superstars of the reviewing scene it certainly isn’t a get rich quick scheme and it isn’t a full time job (for me at least). It is hard work but very rewarding when you get feedback from someone who has read a review and it has helped them make an informed choice.

So, do you think it’s a great way to get sex toys for free?

Have a go yourself

If you fancy trying blogging and sex toy reviewing for yourself then check out my advice articles for sex toy reviewers.


Found Something Useful, Or Do You Just Like What I Do?
Buy Me a Coffee at ko-fi.com


Leave a comment

All comments are reviewed before publication to prevent spammers from touting their wares on my site. If you are a spammer then please save both your time and mine by not bothering as your posts will never be approved and will be simply deleted.

Latest Reviews

June 25, 2019

Colt Camo Thigh Cuff Sex Sling From Bondara

in BDSM Kit Reviews
Lay back and relax as this thigh sling takes the strain Recently we had the pleasure of reviewing the Colt Camo Thigh Sling, and we had so much fun doing so. This is the first Colt product that we have received to review, and we all looked forward to putting… Read More
June 24, 2019

Satisfyer Vibes Power Flower Vibrator

in Vibrators
A guest review by Harley Fire of the Satisfyer Power Flower I am delighted to be able to bring you this great review by Harley Fire of the Satisfyer Vibes Power Flower. A vibrator with a tip that is unlike anything else I have tried. As Satisfyer seem to be… Read More
Jun 19, 2019

Uberrime Splendid Dual-Density Silicone Dildo

in Dildos
A dual-density dildo that really hits the spot I just love receiving packages from… Read More
Jun 12, 2019

Uberrime Night King Fantasy Dildo Fire & Ice Colours

in Dildos
A fantastic fantasy dildo, have some Night King fun as winter is coming I'm so pleased to… Read More

Recent Articles

June 05, 2019

This Secret Sex Trick Will Have Your Lover Begging You for More

You dream of a passionate love life, but a busy lifestyle and stress has other plans for you. If your sex life needs a little boost, there’s a secret sex trick that will leave you and your lover panting for more. Get steamy in the bedroom and introduce this… Read More
May 30, 2019

Buying Sex Toys On A Budget

You can enjoy a body safe wank on a budget I don't need to preach to anyone about how times can be hard and even if you haven't got much spare cash we all need some excitement in our lives. By excitement, I mean the sexual kind (that's the best type anyway).… Read More
Mar 24, 2019

Best Male Milking Machines

The best machines for hands free orgasms, or, a posh wank I am often asked which is the… Read More
Aug 27, 2018

Experiencing Burning Or Stinging When Stimming?

Here are some pointers to smooth things out a bit Stinging or burning is often caused by… Read More

Latest Blog Posts

June 22, 2019

What Is The Difference Between TENS, EMS And E-stim Equipment

in Blog
Confused by the three terms, TENS, EMS & E-stim? You are not alone That is a question that often turns up, and I will do my best to answer it in this article. Erotic electrostimulation refers to the use of specially designed equipment to apply electrical… Read More
June 14, 2019

Win A Tantric Massage Starter Set Courtesy of Karma Tantric

in Blog
Win A Tantric Massage Starter Set Courtesy of Karma Tantric If you enjoyed this fantastic article about Tantric Massage then you will love this competition that is being sponsored by Karma Tantric. Tantric massage agency in London, Karma Tantric, are giving… Read More
May 29, 2019

Conductive Rubber Estim Electrodes

in Blog
Conductive rubber is an often overlooked material for making cheap and highly effective… Read More
May 27, 2019

Sparkzz At Xtasia Is A Fantastic Electroplay Event

in Blog
If you want to experience electroplay then this event is perfect Well, Stunt Cock and… Read More
×
0
Shares
0
Shares