Latest Reviews

Joannes Reviews

I have a lot of fun reviewing sex toys and adult related products and I hope that you enjoy my reviews and find them useful. It is always good to see someone's opinion of an item before you consider parting with your hard earned cash.

Children categories

E-Stim

E-Stim (52)

I have a lot of fun reviewing sex toys and adult related products and I hope that you enjoy my reviews and find them useful. I started experimenting with e-stim in 2015 and have never looked back, I love it. I hope that you find these reviews useful as it is always good to see someones opinion of an item before you consider parting with your hard earned cash.

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Sex & Fucking Machines

Sex & Fucking Machines (28)

I love reviewing sexmachines and fucking machines as they are just so much fun. But they do carry a hefty pricetag so if you want to see my opinions on the machines that I have tried out then enjoy my reviwews.

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Dildos

Dildos (93)

I love dildo fun and games and I enjoy reviewing them. I tend to not leave much to the imagination when I write my reviews and I will give you the good points as well as the bad so that you can make an informed decision about future purchases.

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Male Masturbators

Male Masturbators (17)

I also enjoy revieiwing male masturbators with the help of my trusty 'Stuntcock'. I often get involved in the reviewing process to get a good feel for how well these sextoys perform. There is a growing number of amazing male masturbators around now so check out my reviews to see what I think of some of them.

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Lube Reviews

Lube Reviews (25)

Everyone should be using good quality lubricants in their sex play, you may think that you don't need it but trust me it can make things so much better if you lube up. It is essential if you are considering anal sex and highly recommended for vaginals ex as well.

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Vibrators

Vibrators (96)

Who doesn't enjoy some vibrator action when the mood strikes. I know I do and I have enjoyed reviewing all of these sex toys so that you can get an understanding of why they work and why some of them don't work as well as the others.

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Butt Plugs

Butt Plugs (17)

If you are here then you probably enjoy having your butt crammed full of lots of kinky sex toys like me. Well let me show you which ones are worth putting where the sun doesn't shine and which ones are just fit for the bin.

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BDSM Kit Reviews

BDSM Kit Reviews (73)

I like it kinky and love the whole world of BDSM and enjoy reviewing BDSM related equipment from some of the best manufacturers around. Check out these reviews to see if something takes your fancy.

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Bad Dragon Product Reviews

Bad Dragon Product Reviews (0)

I adore the range of products from Bad Dragon. All of their dildos and masturbators are 100% Platinum body safe silicone and that means they are latex and phthalate free. The designs are all so out of this world and kinky fantasy dildos really flick my switch. I hope that you enjoy these reviews.

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Other Reviews

Other Reviews (32)

These reviews are of products that don't readily fit into any of my other categories. If it's weird or unusual then it's probably in here but don't let that put you off there are some great pieces of kit reviewed here.

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Cock Rings

Cock Rings (4)

Cock rings can be a lot of fun, they also have a very real purpose in aiding and maintaining bigger harder erections and with the amazing array of different ones on the market it can be hard to choose a good one. So check out these reviews.

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ABDL Product Reviews

ABDL Product Reviews (10)

Adult Baby/Diaper Lover. This is typically a lifestyle choice (A fetish for some) where a adult acts like a baby for comfort reasons. Many people use this to deal with stress, traumatic life events, or just because this is how they chose to live their life. People who are into this might wear adult diapers, use pacifiers, and other various objects that one might use for a child or toddler.

This does not mean that they are attracted to children at all, it is purely a lifestyle and roleplay choice. These reviews are of ABDL products and a lot of them have a cross over use in more generally accepted BDSM practices.

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Sexy Shoes And Clothing

Sexy Shoes And Clothing (2)

These reviews are of sexy outfits, shoes and kinky fuck me boots. It is always good and fun to dress to impress and these items of clothing and footwear make sub'r' and I feel just so sexy. So check them out and see why we like them so much.

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The BFG fantasy silicone dildo from Mr Hankey teases and pleases

I love dildos that have lots of textures, and so does sub'r'. We both relish the delightful sensations that they generate as you thrust them in and out of any waiting orifice.

We were both delighted when Mr Hankey sent us something from the new Xtra-Small Series. It was the BFG which is a silicone dildo covered in delightful textures.

"Thrusting with it is sublime. The combination of the textures, changes in diameter and the constant pressure on my g-spot means I can get myself off quickly with the BFG. I also enjoy long slow lady-wanks with it too, it is a very versatile dildo."

sub 'r'

The BFG is more commonly known as the Big Fucking Genital. It is available in four huge sizes as well as this more modestly proportioned one.

The Xtra-Small Series is fantastic as it opens up the great Mr Hankeys designs to a broader audience, so let me tell you how much fun this dildo can be.

Additional Info

  • Overall Rating 9.2

Super sexy tingly skin play fun with this fun electrode

Now it is no secret that I adore my electrostimulation play. Since being introduced to it four years ago, I have learnt so much about this kinky way of achieving hands-free orgasms.

I have reviewed numerous control boxes and electrodes over the time I have been playing with electrons.

"One set up I really enjoy is a pad electrode on one foot and the Electrowhisker being used on the other leg. You get the enticing skin play tingles coupled with the current going through your groin on its way to the pad on your feet, and this feels breathtaking."

Joanne

It's so nice when I come across something totally different from anything that I have tried before. That is what happened though, the first time I used the ElectroWhisker from E-Stim Systems.

It looks like an innocuous basting brush, but this brush has a far kinkier use compared to its kitchen cousin. So, let me tell you all about the ElectroWhisker Monopole Electrode.

Additional Info

  • Overall Rating 9.0

A delightful little bullet vibe that packs a punch

I was delighted when Ann Summers sent me one of their newest vibrators to review before its launch. It is so lovely to be one of the first people to try out a new toy.

They sent me two vibrators to review, this one, the Whisper Vibrator and also the Whisper Rabbit Vibrator.

"I really like pressing the tip on my clitoris and relishing the deep vibrations, circling it also feel great too. I also tend to "dip" when using bullet vibes. As the clitoral stimulation becomes almost too much, I push the vibe into my vagina to enjoy some deeper vibrations."

Joanne

I decided to review the bullet vibe myself and have let my sexy submissive review the rabbit vibe as she adores rabbits.

So after a couple of weeks playing with this one, I'm ready to tell you how I got on with it. So, sit back and let me tell you all about the Ann Summers Whisper Vibrator.

Additional Info

  • Overall Rating 8.8

A dildo with sublime texture and changes in girth that feels amazing

Woohoo! I have found another fantastic purveyor of silicone pleasure stick (dildos) that produces some fabulous creations.

I have been fortunate to have been able to recently run a competition to win one of their fantastic creations, the Silicone Anteros Dildo.

"Slowly thrusting with the Rhea feels divine, but it is when you really give yourself a hard pounding that you really enjoy the combination of girth changes and texture."

Joanne

Now when Ylva & Dite sent me that dildo to giveaway in a competition, they also sent me another sublime dildo to review and this one in the Rhea.

So read on to find out about this fabulous company and their creations. In particular, how my pussy got on with the Rhea silicone dildo.

Additional Info

  • Overall Rating 9.2

Another fine creation from So Divine

I love my So Divine sex toys. So I was delighted when they got in touch with me asking if I would review their new Black Juju real feel silicone dildo for them.

Result, I love silicone dildos for the reasons stated later in this review, and I looked forward to receiving and reviewing this lovely looking phallus.

"When masturbating, I like to be filled even if just rubbing my clitoris. I love having something inside me to clamp down upon as I orgasm and the Black Juju is perfect for this role."

Joanne

I didn't have long to wait, and I set about getting to know my new silicone friend in the biblical sense, of course.

So read on to find out how my pussy got on with the Black Juju dildo.

Additional Info

  • Overall Rating 9.0

Kegel balls can be a lot of fun, using them can have great benefits to your sex life

Who would turn down the opportunity to improve their sexual performance and tackle some lady issues often present in later life?

I know I love a challenge, especially when it involves playing with insertables, of course. So, I was delighted when So Divine got in touch asking if I would like to review their new Kegl Ball Training Set.

"As they are 100% waterproof, you can even do your exercises while using the bath or shower. I enjoy using them in the bath clenching and squeezing them. This always gets me very horny, and it is nice to finish a training session with a hard orgasm — much more fun than going to the gym LOL."

Joanne

They have a set of three kegel balls, each differing in weight and size, and I know how much fun this type of training can be having reviewed others in the past.

I didn't have to wait long for them to arrive. Once they did, it was time for a vaginal workout with "Eye of the tiger" playing in the background.

Additional Info

  • Overall Rating 9.0

Ride the Cowgirl for some intense orgasms

Now it is no secret that I am addicted to sex machines. I love them for their sheer power, stamina and ability to deliver incredibly hard orgasms time and time again.

I have reviewed the Sybian, Motorbunny and Tremor but so far the Cowgirl had eluded me. That is until I got a very kind offer from Nat who used to blog over on coolerthanaglassdildo.com. She has now retired from reviewing and was moving house.

"I had to be helped off it as my legs were like jelly and the sight of the Cowgirl covered in squirt and pussy juice was something else."

Joanne

Downsizing is always a hard thing to do. She had no space for her Cowgirl so she asked me if I wanted it and I was blown away by her generous offer - Thank you, Nat.

So with the fourth and last piece to the ride-on sex machine puzzle in my hands, it was time to get to know it and see how it performed. So read on to see what I think of it.

Additional Info

  • Overall Rating 9.4

The Beowulf is a silicone dildo of beastly proportions

I have long been a fan of Hankeys Toys, their silicone delights are a sight to behold. With a reputation for larger than life dildos, they are a size queens dream.

I was therefore delighted when they got in touch with me asking if I would like to review the Beowulf for them as well as two of their new XS range of dildos.

"It just gets better and better as you slide more inside with each inch of this dildo opening you up wider and wider until you feel you can't take any more."

Joanne

As you can well imagine, it didn't take me long to decide on how to reply, the chance to enjoy some Hankeys Silicone is not to be missed.

So after a short wait, the doorbell rang, and I went to receive a box of dicks from the courier. Many bottles of lube later, I am ready to tell you all about the Beowulf and what I think of it. So read on to how I got on with it.

Additional Info

  • Overall Rating 9.0

A hood designed for sucking cock and pussy eating pleasure

I love playing with BDSM kit, and kink is fantastic as far as I am concerned. So, when Latex, Leather & Lace asked if I would be interested in reviewing the Mister B's Datex Cocksucker Hood who was I to say no?

Masks and hoods are so much fun for lots of reasons, and I loved the idea of trying this one out.

"I really enjoyed wearing it for oral sex, and I have been told by a very reliable source (Stunt Cock) that bright red lipstick really goes well with this black mask."

Joanne

The mask is made from Datex, which is super stretchy and shiny, all the more reason to love it.

So let me tell you why I enjoyed reviewing this mask and why masks are so much fun.

Additional Info

  • Overall Rating 8.8

The Electro Speculum takes kinky medical play to the next level

Some things in life make you ponder; they make you sit there, thinking for quite some time. The Electro Speculum from E-Stim Systems is one of those things.

Ever since I laid eyes on one for the first time, it both worried, frightened and intrigued me in equal proportions.

"The large surface areas of the electrode surfaces mean smooth sensations, it felt like pins and needles deep inside me in a pleasant way. I didn't get the ghost fucking sensation, but that was probably because of being held rigidly open by cold hard steel."

Joanne

I have never met another woman who doesn't say that they hate internal exams. I guess some (like me) put on a persona of hating them though. Secretly, I get a bit of a kick out of having someone see inside me — having them look, touch and tease my most intimate areas.

So, after lots of deliberation, I decided to buy myself one of these medical/e-stim cross over devices from E-Stim Systems to satisfy my kinky curiosity.

Additional Info

  • Overall Rating 8.6

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