John Thomas Toys PERVY PATRICK Platinum Silicone Dildo Review

Written by  Aug 07, 2020

Pervy Patrick is a dildo with some character

I was approached by John Thomas Toys to see if I would like to review their Pervy Patrick Dildo. Well, who am I to decline to review a sex toy, especially a silicone dildo with such a fun name?

I have to admit to really enjoying the John Thomas Toys dildos that I have reviewed so far with the help of my lovely submissive.

"One thing that I really like about the Pervy Patrick is the glans and its coronal ridge. The way the foreskin is retracted makes it almost look like a double coronal ridge, and this feels incredible against my g-spot."

Joanne

They are all imaginative designs with some really nice features, and I looked forward to seeing if this one would live up to its predecessors.

So read on to find out what we thought of the Pervy Patrick dildo.

Delivery and Packaging

As usual, a plain, well-sealed box arrived in very quick order, and of course, I excitedly dived in to get a better look at this pervy guy.

John Thomas Toys never put anything on the outside of the box to elude as to its contents. I always have a broad smile for the delivery person, as they have no idea how much cock they are dropping off at my doorstep :-)

When I opened the box, there was some packing to keep the dildos still in transit, each dildo is wrapped in a clear plastic wrap and adorned with a John Thomas Toys gold-coloured foil sticker. So you know that the dildo was stored and shipped in pristine condition. Although saying that it is always advisable to wash any toy before using it.

Four sizes of the Pervy Patrick dildo are quite a sight
The four sizes of the Pervy Patrick dildo are quite a sight

Materials and design

John Thomas Toys Pervy Patrick Dildo is made from 100% platinum cure silicone, they are moulded inside copper moulds. The copper moulds are not used by every company as they are more expensive. However, they do ensure that every dildo to come out of that mould will have precisely the same features.

Pervy Patrick is available in four sizes and two hardness ratings, these being soft or medium. At the moment it's only available in beige but that is a colour that suits it very well indeed.

* SMALL MEDIUM LARGE X LARGE
Length: 7"/17.78cm 9"/22.86cm 12"/30.48cm 16"/40.64cm
Base Height: 2"/5.08cm 2.6"/6.6cm 3.5"/8.89cm 4.2"/10.66cm
Circumference top of shaft): 4.2"/10.66cm 5.8"/14.73cm 7.4"/18.79cm 9.5"/24.13cm
Circumference (middle of shaft): 4.5"/11.43cm 6"/15.24cm 8"/20.32cm 10.4"/26.41cm
Circumference (base): 8.8"/22.35cm 11.2"/28.44cm 15.2"/38.6cm 20"/50.8cm
Max Insertable Length: 5.8"/14.73cm 7.6"/19.3cm 10.2"/25.9cm 13.2"/33.52cm
Weight: 0.26kg/0.57lbs (*variable) 0.57kg /1.24lbs (*variable) 1.38kg/3.03lbs (*variable) 3.26kg/7.18lbs (*variable)
Price: £69.99 £99.99 £169.99 £229.99

John Thomas Toys include a faux velvet drawstring bag with every dildo. These bags are sized to fit the dildos well, and the drawstring ensures that the dildo is kept safe and sound until next time.

The bags are in black with some lovely white branding on the front, which stands out well and looks great. The velvet bags now come in a small plastic carrier bag, which is also branded. The carrier bag can then be reused for other things, although you may not want to take it shopping to the supermarket.

Each Pervy Patrick dildo comes with its own size of faux velvet storage bag
Each Pervy Patrick dildo comes with its own size of faux velvet storage bag and it is a nice touch

Silicone is my preferred insertable material, and I have excellent reasons for this. Not only is it non-porous, but it is also latex and phthalate-free. This is very important for insertable sex toys. Another positive of silicone sex toys is that they are stain-resistant and also very durable.

John Thomas Toys show how much faith they have in their products by offering a lifetime warranty. Pervy Patrick can be washed in warm soapy water or placed in a dishwasher. I usually have to put mine in late so that I know no one else will empty the dishwasher for me lol.

Another joy with silicone is that you can warm it up or chill it down (please do not place it in the freezer or heat it too high), remember that you will be inserting it and the temperature cannot be too extreme. You really do not want to explain to A & E how you got frostbite. The safest way is to use cool or warm water.

Ok, so that's enough about silicone, now let's get onto the other important part, the features of this dildo.

Pervy Patrick is another beautifully sculpted dildo from John Thomas Toys. The first thing I noticed was the pronounced glans, the deep ridges caused by the foreskin being pulled right back really draw your eye. Then there are the lovely looking veins that run along the shaft of the dildo, these features really made me excited to feel the toy in use. As you turn the dildo, you then notice that the shaft widens from just under the glans. This will give you a slight stretch to enjoy.

The glans with its rolled back foreskin provides some intense sensations
The glans with its rolled back foreskin provides some intense sensations

The balls on Pervy Patrick are sizable and heavy, making them great to bounce on if you can take the length, but they also give something to hold onto while using the dildo.

There is a vac-u-lock compatible hole in the base, which is a great addition allowing you to use the dildo in a variety of ways. Suction cup to enjoy in the bath or shower, strap-on or even on a fucking machine. The choice is all yours.

Image showing the vac-u-lock compatible hole in the base of the XL Pervy Patrick
The vac-u-lock hole in the base is very useful but it looks so tiny on the XL dildo

Performance

With my water-based lube to hand (the best option to prolong the life of your silicone toy), I just needed to select which size I wanted to try first. One thing you need to pay attention to on John Tomas Toys is the measurements. While a medium in one design is the perfect fit ( ;-) ) for you, in another design it could be far too small. I usually have a tendency to prefer the large but have often needed to downsize to the medium.

I am happy to say that the large is my go-to size for Pervy Patrick. I relished the feeling of being stretched open wider and wider as I took more of its ample length. The veins on the shaft feel fantastic and are a nice feature, especially if you twist it slightly as you thrust it in and out.

The veins on the shaft also feel fantastic
The veins on the shaft also feel fantastic

One thing that I really like about the Pervy Patrick is the glans and its coronal ridge. The way the foreskin is retracted makes it almost look like a double coronal ridge, and this feels incredible against my g-spot.

This blend of silicone feels really nice with a little bit of drag as you run your fingers over it. There is also a nice amount of squish so you can enjoy clamping down on it as you orgasm.

With only a slight droop when held horizontally, it is very easy to use John Thomas Toys Pervy Patrick on a fucking machine. Just be prepared to anchor the legs as the weight may cause your machine to tip forward.

Image showing the flexibility of the Pervy Patrick dildo
The veins on the shaft also feel fantastic

Pervy Patrick is straightforward to clean, just ensure that you get all the goo out from between the ridges under the glans. Do not forget to let the dildo completely dry before storing it away until you are ready to play again.

I really enjoyed this dildo, and the combination of texture and girth on it works really well. That double coronal ridge is something to be experienced. I can highly recommend it for this feature, let alone all of the other fantastic features. It is a massive hit with me. My submissive, the lovely sub'r' had a similar reaction to the medium that she took home to enjoy.

Check out Joanne's review of the Pervy Patrick body-safe silicone dildo from @JohnThomasToys. Click to Tweet

Image showing all four sizes of the Pervy patrick dildo
All four sizes of Pervy patrick dildo nestled together



Key Features

Key features:

  • 100% body-safe platinum cure silicone
  • Four sizes available
  • Two hardness ratings
  • Hole in the base for vac-u-lock attachment
  • Free - Velvet feel drawstring storage bag
  • Deep ridges under glans
  • Lifetime guarantee

I would recommend it to:

  • Anyone looking for a body-safe silicone dildo
  • Anyone looking for a vac-u-lock system compatible dildo
  • Anyone no matter what size they like, as the four sizes available mean there is something for everyone
  • Anyone looking for a human-looking dildo

I wouldn't recommend it to:

  • Anyone who wants a fantasy dildo
  • Anyone who wants more bumps and ridges
  • Anyone who needs a straight shaft

Funny image of all four sizes of the Pervy patrick dildo
"Now boys, let me tell you about your old man, and his any hole is a goal strategy"

Final Thoughts

I enjoyed reviewing Pervy Patrick, not only is it made from a high-quality silicone blend, but he is also beautifully made. I love the way the designer took a standard human-looking cock, and added a couple of extra features to make it more enjoyable to use.

John Thomas Toys products always give me a feeling of excellent quality and a fantastic price. A silicone toy is an investment and will last you a lifetime if you look after it properly.

Pervy Patrick is another fantastic dildo from John Thomas Toys and I believe that their dildos are some of the best out there. For such a relatively new company their range of products and the quality and materials used is first class.

I have no hesitation in giving the Pervy Patrick dildo a very strong recommendation for anyone who loves body-safe dildos.

I was sent the Pervy Patrick Dildos by John Thoams Toys and I would like to thank them for giving me the opportunity to review it for them.

Joanne's rating

Overall
Design
Features
Functionality
Ease of use
Price

Where Can I Get One From?

John Thomas Toys

Grab one of these fantastic dildos direct from John Thomas Toys from just £69.99, at the time of publishing this review it's on sale with prices starting at just £35.

Check them out and don’t forget to tell them that Joanne says "Hi".



Disclosure

This review does not contain affiliate links, for more information about affiliate links check out my disclosure page.

Additional Info

  • Overall Rating: 9.4
Joanne Summers

Sex Blogger, Review, Dildo Officianado, Kinky Quimsticking, Electrosex Loving Mum.

I have been reviewing sex toys and adult products for the last five years and I love doing what I do. If you find my reviews and articles interesting please leave a comment for me on them, I love reading feedback about them.

2 comments

  • Dave
    Comment Link Dave Monday, 10 August 2020 13:50

    Lovely review, thanks :) glad you liked it !

  • Joanne Summers
    Comment Link Joanne Summers Tuesday, 11 August 2020 12:36

    Thanks Dave,

    It is another fantastic creation from John Thomas Toys and the coronal ridge textures are sublime.

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