Thoughts About Humiliation Play And Watersports : Dom Signs
I am a member of a kinky online community, a kinky blogging community and a munch. I have met and talked with people about innumerable types of kinks. And mostly nobody bats an eye at any of them. Impact play, needle play, CBT and so many other activities that to the vanilla world are incomprehensible. So it seems like the philosophy of Your Kink Is Not My Kink But Your Kink Is OK is the law of the land.
Except, maybe, sometimes, it isn’t.
Lillith and I engage in watersports and no, I don’t mean we play water polo or ride jet skis. We have a D/s relationship, a mostly long distance relationship, so almost all of our time together is possible through the miracle of modern technology. That can present barriers in how we interact as a D/s couple so we have to get inventive as we explore what D/s and kink means to us. Some of the ways that we do that is that she cedes control of certain things in her life and has a series of tasks and rules to follow. One of these rules is that she must ask permission to pee. In a way, for us, it is no different than orgasm control, except that it requires more attentiveness on my part and alternate arrangements if I am unavailable. Since I like rules and tasks to have a purpose and she would like to expand her English vocabulary (She speaks 4 languages!) she must first define and use a word of my choosing in a sentence correctly.
But it doesn’t end there. Lillith and I both enjoy humiliation play and watersports dovetails into that quite nicely. We recently had a test period of pushing our D/s further than we have previously that we called “mean week”. I used this opportunity to push the humiliation button a bit harder. For several days she had to wear the same pair of panties and when she was allowed to pee she had to use them to wipe herself and put them back on. I know this might seem extreme to some people, but it is how we have chosen to explore these facets of our relationship. If this is too much for you, you might want to buckle up for the next bit.
We have taken these explorations further. As I mentioned, we are mostly LDR, but not always. We spent some time together last December in person. While we had that chance we did some of the things we had only talked about. While showering together I both peed on her and in her mouth, from a D/s perspective it was incredibly powerful. The look of joy and submission in her eyes was sublime. We both came away from that feeling more connected than ever. There will definitely be more time spent seeing where this road leads.
A few words here about safety and potential health issues. Contrary to popular opinion urine is not sterile. Nothing that comes out of your body is. Microbes exist in all bodily fluids, but that doesn’t mean that is unhealthy. As long as you and your partner don’t have a kidney or bladder infection or any other sort of UTI it is perfectly safe. Many people claim (unproven) health benefits from drinking your own urine (and they think we are weird) so there is no reason to indulge if this is where your kink takes you and your partner.
Now that I have talked about the how and why of our interest in watersports I will return to YKINMYBYKIOK. I have written about this topic in a few tweets and blogposts and it has had mixed reception at best. For a piece of fictional writing that only hinted at it the comments mostly were to hint at the ick factor. I understand that is a very taboo area for many people and it doesn’t speak to their preferences, but that isn’t a best practice in my opinion. After all many of your kinks don’t speak to me either and so I always do my best to think hard about the impact of my words on the people who have chosen to be brave and share something so personal and intimate with the world at large. After all we already fight an uphill battle against the morality police who don’t feel that anyone should talk about these things in any way shape or form and if we don’t look out for each other no one else will. I am not asking anyone to share my point of view on my kinks, just as you don’t need my approval, or disapproval on your kinks. So please, give a moment’s thought to what you are contributing to the conversation. Otherwise we might stop talking about these things at all and I can’t see how that will make anything better for any of us.
As long as we are all consenting adults and harming no one, what we do to bring each other please should be open for discussion and not condemnation.
I enjoyed reading Dom Signs thoughts on the often taboo subject of watersports, it evokes mixed reactions and emotions. I loved this post and it highlights one thing in particular, we should all consider how we react to others especially in the kink community where it seems like additional hurdles are placed infront of us on an almost daily basis. We don't all enjoy the same kinks, but I for one will fight tooth and nail for everyone's right to enjoy consensual activities that are safe and legal whatever they are. We should all experiment and explore new things while remembering that communication and consent are the primary rules that everything else develops from. Thanks Dom Signs, check out his sites and follow him on twitter to stay abreast of his new work.