I love dildo fun and games and I enjoy reviewing them. I tend to not leave much to the imagination when I write my reviews and I will give you the good points as well as the bad so that you can make an informed decision about future purchases.

The web slinger certainly knows how to stretch things nicely

I received a message from John Thomas Toys to ask if I would like to review their latest silicone stretcher.

As I can never say no to JTT, of course, I said yes. Although I did have second thoughts after I was told the name. I do not like creepy crawlies, so you may understand why I did hesitate when I found out its name - Spidey's Web.

"These bumps feel fantastic and can also be used to measure how far you manage to take the length of Spidey's Web. As I moved the stretcher around, the feel of them had me squirming and curling my toes quickly."


Luckily I was assured no spiders were included, which put my mind at ease.

With that reassurance, I was happy for them to send the silicone stretcher set to me to review, and I just needed to wait for them to arrive.

Additional Info

  • Overall Rating 9.4

With "Rodney you plonker" ringing in my ears, I could hardly contain my excitement

John Thomas Toys approached me to ask if I would like to review their latest silicone stretcher. How could I possibly say no, I do love a challenge after all?

I will admit that when they told me the name was Rodney's Plonker, I did laugh. But then I had to wonder what it would look like as they weren't even listed in their store at the time.

"It was easy to slide the head inside but more of a challenge to take the entire width of the widening shaft. As I move further down the shaft, the width stretches me nicely."


I was excited to see what they looked like and to get my hands (and other body parts) on them. John Thomas Toys have such a wide variety of designs I could not even guess what they would look like. As with all John Thomas Toys creations I knew one thign for sure - it was probably going to be larger than life.

So, with plenty of water-based lube ready on hand, I just needed to sit back and wait for Rodney's Plonker to arrive.

Additional Info

  • Overall Rating 9.4

Another fantastic dildo perfect for my twisted mind

John Thomas Toys got in touch with me to see if I fancied reviewing their latest offering of silicone dildos. As usual, I just couldn't say no.

So a few days later, I received a large, heavy box with no indication on the outside of the box as to its contents. I knew without even opening it that it was from John Thomas Toys. This was simply due to the shape, size and weight.

"I could feel each sucker rubbing the walls of my pussy, creating mesmerising feelings. The suckers grow in size as you move down the shaft, and I found myself wanting more and more."


On opening the box, I was pleasantly surprised by the latest twisted design. I was looking forward to having fun reviewing them.

I have really had a lot of time to get to know this beast of a dildo due to several problems delaying this review. But I am happy to say those are sorted now (thank you for being so understanding, JTT). So here are my thoughts on the Twisted Tentacle Dildo.

Additional Info

  • Overall Rating 9.4

Tentacle dildos are so much fun, this one takes things to extremes

It's been a while since John Thomas Toys last contacted me about sending me anything to review. So I was excited when they asked if they could send me a new design they have come up with.

All I was told in advance was that the name was Kraken's Tentacle. The title gave me a rough idea of what it may look like, though, but it was still a surprise when I took them out of the box. Stunt Cock laughed when I told him its name, he said I have a lot in common with the Kraken. When I asked him what he meant, he just laughed and said we have both swallowed a lot of "seamen". He got a good jab to his ribs for that one.

"By angling the tentacle just right, I could enjoy the feel of running the suckers over my clit on every movement of the tentacle. By adding a slight twist, I found it gave some fantastic sensations."


The box when it arrived was hefty, and upon opening it, I could see why. John Thomas Toys always send me all four sizes to review; this time was no different.

A Kraken is a giant octopus type creature and the size of its tentacles needed to match its legendary reputation. These tentacles definitely do not disappoint in that regards.

Additional Info

  • Overall Rating 9.4

sub'r' takes Mr Michelin for a test drive

I love it when we receive a package from John Thomas Toys. I know two things for sure when one tips up. Firstly it is going to be contain larger than life toys and they will be lots of fun.

Secondly, I know whatever is inside will be body-safe. Again we weren't disappointed, although we felt sorry for the posties back as this box weighs a bomb

"Mr Michelin has a look that you will no doubt recognise. I do not doubt that Mrs Michelin is one happy lady as he's very well proportioned with his recognisable rings that provide lots of intense stimulation."


When Joanne did her unboxing video, I could almost hear myself getting wetter and wetter, so I asked if she wanted me to review this one.

I was delighted when she said yes, and so here is my review of this lovely silicone dildo from John Thomas Toys.

Additional Info

  • Overall Rating 10.0

The Humphrey dildo is a stunner that feels as good as it looks

Organotoy is a German artisanal company created in 2011 with the plan to make high-quality sex toys. They offer some unique silicone toys that are handmade to order, and they look incredible.

I first saw the fantastic products made by Organotoy on Twitter. After commenting on the image, they contacted me to see if I would be interested in reviewing one of their products.

"The large bumps feel amazing against my pussy walls. I like to give it a slight twist to really ramp up the sensations when thrusting with it."


I really wanted a chance to see one of their products in person, so I jumped at the opportunity to check one of their dildos out.

That led to the dilemma as to who would get to try it first, so sub 'r' and I had a little discussion on who would try out this delectable treat. Unfortunately for sub 'r', I won this one (yeah, for me :p ).

We were all really looking forward to seeing this dildo upfront and personal. Even with Brexit and Covid 19, the shipping did not take as long as we thought it might.

Additional Info

  • Overall Rating 9.2

This dildo takes fantasy dildo play to another level (of stretch)

I am once again delighted to have received some more John Thomas Toys dildos.

You can't have too many good toys, and I know that the quality of John Thomas Toys dildos are worth making room for.

"I can honestly say that this is my first time with an anatomically correct dog dong. I did feel a little intimidated with these dildos as the small is a lot larger than I expected."


When the postie arrived with two large boxes, I knew precisely who they were from. I just had no idea what the contents were.

I am always excited to open the boxes so that I can see what I've been sent. They have so much choice on their website, and I know it will be something new each time.

Additional Info

  • Overall Rating 9.4

Brutus will give any hole a run for its money

Before finishing the reviews for my last two dildos from John Thomas Toys, another box arrived on my doorstep.

I only receive this type of large and heavy box from one manufacturer, so this one was definitely from John Thomas Toys, and that pretty much made my day.

"After strapping her to my spanking bench, sub 'r' also thoroughly enjoyed the attention of Brutus. It was not long before he brought her to completion (after she asked for permission to cum, of course)."


I knew that this box contained a set of four silicone dildo's called Brutus. So on checking my e-mails and the John Thomas Toys website, I was very excited to take them out of the box to play with them (oops, I mean to professionally review).

But before getting my kink on with them, I had to rush straight to my new workshop to record an unboxing video and to take the review photos. All of which needed doing before I took lots of pleasure from thoroughly examining and 'cough', testing this dildo out.

Additional Info

  • Overall Rating 9.4

Taking dildo play to a whole new depth

Even when I am busy with various other projects and reviews, when John Thomas Toys approach me with an offer of sending me more, I just can't seem to say no.

How can I turn down great products that I get to play with? Especially when I know the quality of the dildos being sent.

"The vein textures are enough to add lots of pleasurable sensation as you work more and more inside. Once fully inserted, I relished the feeling of being full and the satisfaction of knowing I took it all - Yay for me!"


So I said yes, I would be happy to receive them. As these dildos were a brand new design, I was given the name but had no idea what they looked like. That was because they had not even put them up on their website.

This is the review for Henry (not the vacuum cleaner I hasten to add), a silicone dildo from John Thomas Toys.

Additional Info

  • Overall Rating 9.0

Donkey Dong is a bit of a beast

John Thomas Toys once again approached me to see if I wanted to review two new designs of dildos.

I can never say no because they not only ask so nicely, but they also produce some awe-inspiring silicone dildos and stretchers.

"I got the glowing version to review, and I have to say it blew me away the first time I switched the lights off and saw its lovely green glow. I don't know what the neighbours must have thought if they saw the Medium charging on my bedroom window sill LOL."


John Thomas Toys gave me the names, but I had no idea what they would actually look like. This was because they were so new they hadn't even added them to their website.

So with just the names, I sat back and waited for two boxes to arrive full of some nice cock for me to play with.

Additional Info

  • Overall Rating 9.4