Dildos

I love dildo fun and games and I enjoy reviewing them. I tend to not leave much to the imagination when I write my reviews and I will give you the good points as well as the bad so that you can make an informed decision about future purchases.

Like its namesake, Godzillaz is a primal beast of a ride

John Thomas Toys asked if they could send me another dildo to review. I do love their toys, and I like working with the company as well. With that in mind, of course, I said yes please.

It definitely helped when they said the name was Godzillaz. I was hoping that they would be nice enough to let me review this dildo as it looks incredible.

"On pushing more of Godzillaz inside, I feel the shaft widening's girth, filling me up nicely. The spikes and the frills were adding different sensations to the dildo. John Thomas Toys really have designed a great dildo."

Joanne

The main question was, would it be as good as it looks. I mean, just look at the pics of Godzillaz; that is some eye-watering well-defined texture there. I do like the little comment on the product page on John Thomas Toys website:

"Godzillaz is a real creature feature from the Jurassic age. Boasting spikes, a curved scaled shaft that has lizard like fans, this dong truly is out of this world!"

So let me tell you all about my encounter with Godzillaz.

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  • Overall Rating 9.6

The Colon Snake is both a challenge and a pleasure to use

John Thomas Toys were very concerned that I may get bored while still in lockdown and offered to send me two new dildos. This one, the Colon Snake and their Diablo's Finger Silcione Dildo.

Ok, so now I may need to get a much bigger storage area to hold them all, but I can never seem to say no.

"I have used it several times now, this is one of those sex toys that feels amazing to insert, and the feeling of fulness is hard to describe but highly arousing."

Joanne

I will admit that when John Thomas Toys said they were sending me Colon Snake, I had no idea what to expect. They had not added them to their website before I did my unboxing video. So I was stunned by what I pulled out of the box.

John Thomas Toys produce high-quality dildos of all shapes and sizes. Their designs are always unique and a heck of a lot of fun to review. Although I don't think I'll ever be able to take on the XL size of any of their range as the girth on them is incredible.

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  • Overall Rating 9.0

The Devils finger will really press your buttons

As soon as I was set up in my new office, John Thomas Toys asked if they could send me some more dildos to review.

I am not going to say no to a chance at getting my hands on some new dildos to review.

"As I expected, I felt every single ridge and bump along my sensitive walls. If you get the angle and dildo size right, you can even rub the claw against your g-spot."

Joanne

I am given the name but have no idea what they look like until they arrive. This is because they often come before John Thomas Toys have put them on their own website. Luckily It was easy to guess which was which when I did the unpacking video.

I was excited to try out my new studio for both videos and photos. It also helped to identify a few things that needed rethinking.

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  • Overall Rating 9.4

IT is a silicone stretcher with both a funny background story and an unusual look

John Thomas Toys were worried that I might be getting bored throughout England's third lockdown, so they let sent me a couple of toys to keep myself "busy".

I was surprised when three heavy boxes arrived. As they were a new design, I was told the names but had no idea what they would look like.

"The whole dildo is stimulation heaven, it rubs my walls wonderfully as it goes in and out. Give it a little twist and my toes were curling."

Joanne

I had to really restrain myself not to open the boxes at home before filming the unboxing video for you to watch. I must say it was not an easy feat, and so Stuntcock just locked them away :-)

While John Thomas Toys were kind enough to package the dildo's into separate boxes, I still felt sorry for the postie. Each box weighs a lot, just imagine four hefty silicone dildos in each box.

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  • Overall Rating 9.0

Forget the ring toss, challenge your ring

When John Thomas Toys asked if I would like some new toys to review while in yet another lockdown, of course, I said yes.

With so many weeks in lockdown, it is the perfect distraction for me. I was thrilled when I received three boxes of dildos.

"The Challenge shape is easy to start with, but as you can guess from the name, once you reach the first ring, the width expands dramatically, and the challenge begins."

Joanne

This review is for The Challenge. I am reviewing the dildos individually as I feel it would be too long to read a combined review.

Please get comfortable and get ready to hear what I thought of John Thomas Toys The Challenge dildo.

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  • Overall Rating 9.0

Daddy's Cock has more than meets the eye

John Thomas Toys were worried that I may get bored during the countries third lockdown. So they asked if I would like to receive some new dildos to review.

Well, lockdown can get a little boring, so of course, I said yes, please.

"The stretch is virtually immediate and extremely enjoyable. The glans is angled slightly forward to make it easy to insert, and when you look down from the glans, you see how the back arch sticks up to create a delicious ridge"

Joanne

I was surprised when three heavy boxes arrived on my doorstep a few days after being notified they had been dispatched to me.

Although I did find a label placed on the top box rather amusing and had to send out a little tweet about it. How could I find a sticker that said "Do not split" on three boxes of large dildos not funny?

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  • Overall Rating 9.0

The MASTER is a hole stretchers dream of a dildo

Once again, I was delighted when John Thomas Toys got in touch to ask if I would like to review some of their very newest items. I didn't even have to think about it.

As this dildo was new, they had not even placed the pictures on their website before sending them to me. Because of this, I had no idea as to what to expect until a very heavy box arrived.

"You get the slight pop as the whole of the glans slide fully inside you. That is a feeling I always enjoy. As you sink more of the shaft inside, you get to enjoy the slight stretch from the widening shaft."

Joanne

Having already reviewed a selection of dildos and stretchers from John Thomas Toys, I was excited to see what their designers had created now. The names certainly did not give me any ideas.

Knowing only that they were called Master and Essex Geezer, I said yes I would love to review these for you and then I just sat back and waited for them to arrive. This review features the Master dildo.

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  • Overall Rating 9.0

Essex Geezer, a diamond bloke with a huge cock

I do love reviewing and get very excited when I am asked to review something before it is even advertised on the companies website.

Well, this happened again with the John Thomas Toys Essex Geezer dildo. Even though I knew the name, I had no idea what it would actually look like when I agreed to review it.

"Essex Geezer is a chap that you will want more than a one night stand with. I can understand why Essex girls always seem to have a smile on their faces now."

Joanne

If you check out their website, you will see that it's impossible to guess what a product will look like until you can see it. But one thing I knew for sure was it was going to be larger than life.

I never have long to wait for John Thomas Toys to arrive after they say they are sending me something and I could hardly contain my excitement.

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  • Overall Rating 9.0

They say that all good things come in threes and that is true of the Tom, Dick & Zoltok dildo

Reviewing can be hard work, but it does have its fun moments. After all, I have to play with the item before I can write an honest review.

When asked if I would like to review the Tom, Dick and Zoltock toy from John Thomas Toys. It was not even live on their website, so I had no idea what it would even look like. After thinking about it for say, um a whole 5 seconds I said yes.

"Once I wiggled it inside, I found that the three separate heads rubbed along my walls beautifully. The sensation caused was terrific, then to add the three different sides was almost like adding fuel to the fire."

Joanne

I didn't have long to wait for the delivery to arrive after being told it had been dispatched. I was so excited when the doorbell rang that I nearly beat the dog to the door lol.

I will admit to being extremely surprised at the size of the box, as it was much larger than the standard ones I have received in the past.

Additional Info

  • Overall Rating 9.4

Meet the Dick Head, we all know one, and now you can ride one

I always love it when I hear that I am being sent a new toy to review. So when I was told that I would shortly be receiving a set of John Thomas Toys latest additions I could not wait.

With a name like "Dick Head" I just knew that this was going to be a fun one and I was right.

"If you are lucky enough, (or determined enough) to get past the head, you feel the ridge of the glans, then get to enjoy the ridges and bumps of the pulled back foreskin."

Joanne

This novel toy is a stretcher, designed to help you achieve the goal of taking bigger toys and for a size queen like me, it is perfect.

So, grab some popcorn and let me tell you all about my stretching fun with the Dick Head.

Additional Info

  • Overall Rating 9.6

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