sub'r' takes Mr Michelin for a test drive

I love it when we receive a package from John Thomas Toys. I know two things for sure when one tips up. Firstly it is going to be contain larger than life toys and they will be lots of fun.

Secondly, I know whatever is inside will be body-safe. Again we weren't disappointed, although we felt sorry for the posties back as this box weighs a bomb

"Mr Michelin has a look that you will no doubt recognise. I do not doubt that Mrs Michelin is one happy lady as he's very well proportioned with his recognisable rings that provide lots of intense stimulation."

sub'r'

When Joanne did her unboxing video, I could almost hear myself getting wetter and wetter, so I asked if she wanted me to review this one.

I was delighted when she said yes, and so here is my review of this lovely silicone dildo from John Thomas Toys.

The Humphrey dildo is a stunner that feels as good as it looks

Organotoy is a German artisanal company created in 2011 with the plan to make high-quality sex toys. They offer some unique silicone toys that are handmade to order, and they look incredible.

I first saw the fantastic products made by Organotoy on Twitter. After commenting on the image, they contacted me to see if I would be interested in reviewing one of their products.

"The large bumps feel amazing against my pussy walls. I like to give it a slight twist to really ramp up the sensations when thrusting with it."

Joanne

I really wanted a chance to see one of their products in person, so I jumped at the opportunity to check one of their dildos out.

That led to the dilemma as to who would get to try it first, so sub 'r' and I had a little discussion on who would try out this delectable treat. Unfortunately for sub 'r', I won this one (yeah, for me :p ).

We were all really looking forward to seeing this dildo upfront and personal. Even with Brexit and Covid 19, the shipping did not take as long as we thought it might.

A gnomes hat with an all together kinkier purpose

I'm sure that the delivery person gets their daily workout when they deliver my latest batch of silicone cock from John Thomas Toys.

This one box of Edgware Trainers holds approximately 9.95kg of silicone securely inside.

"The slight squish makes a more comfortable ride for me. I enjoy the feel of my muscles clamping down on the dildo, especially during an orgasm where I love clamping down on whatever is inside my pussy."

Joanne

I don't always know what will be arriving, so sometimes it's a pleasant surprise to see the contents. I will admit that occasionally I will open the box for a sneaky peek before doing the unboxing video.

No one is good enough to memorise all the different dildos and stretchers that John Thomas Toys offer. They have a massive range of huge hole stretchers and pleasers that well worth checking out.

This dildo takes fantasy dildo play to another level (of stretch)

I am once again delighted to have received some more John Thomas Toys dildos.

You can't have too many good toys, and I know that the quality of John Thomas Toys dildos are worth making room for.

"I can honestly say that this is my first time with an anatomically correct dog dong. I did feel a little intimidated with these dildos as the small is a lot larger than I expected."

Joanne

When the postie arrived with two large boxes, I knew precisely who they were from. I just had no idea what the contents were.

I am always excited to open the boxes so that I can see what I've been sent. They have so much choice on their website, and I know it will be something new each time.

It's soooooooo big, a classic design made Mega by John Thomas Toys

John Thomas Toys emailed me to check if I was happy to receive some more items to review. After I said yes, I took another look in my toy box and realised I would have to put more into temporary storage at the office/workshop.

I enjoy their products so much that I just can't say no. But hey, we are already thinking of moving somewhere larger next year so we can make room for more :-p

"Okay, so The Ripper is a somewhat intimidating stretcher. After some discussion with sub 'r', we decided that it would be used vaginally and not anally. Plus, neither of us wanted to use anything larger than the small; yes, call us both chickens if you wish."

Joanne

If you are the lucky owner of any of their products, I think that you would probably realise my predicament. Would you say no to more of their fantastic silicone products?

Okay, so after the current selection had been re-jiggled, I was ready for some new additions. Plus that meant a little less room at my office/workshop, oops :-)

Brutus will give any hole a run for its money

Before finishing the reviews for my last two dildos from John Thomas Toys, another box arrived on my doorstep.

I only receive this type of large and heavy box from one manufacturer, so this one was definitely from John Thomas Toys, and that pretty much made my day.

"After strapping her to my spanking bench, sub 'r' also thoroughly enjoyed the attention of Brutus. It was not long before he brought her to completion (after she asked for permission to cum, of course)."

Joanne

I knew that this box contained a set of four silicone dildo's called Brutus. So on checking my e-mails and the John Thomas Toys website, I was very excited to take them out of the box to play with them (oops, I mean to professionally review).

But before getting my kink on with them, I had to rush straight to my new workshop to record an unboxing video and to take the review photos. All of which needed doing before I took lots of pleasure from thoroughly examining and 'cough', testing this dildo out.

Taking dildo play to a whole new depth

Even when I am busy with various other projects and reviews, when John Thomas Toys approach me with an offer of sending me more, I just can't seem to say no.

How can I turn down great products that I get to play with? Especially when I know the quality of the dildos being sent.

"The vein textures are enough to add lots of pleasurable sensation as you work more and more inside. Once fully inserted, I relished the feeling of being full and the satisfaction of knowing I took it all - Yay for me!"

Joanne

So I said yes, I would be happy to receive them. As these dildos were a brand new design, I was given the name but had no idea what they looked like. That was because they had not even put them up on their website.

This is the review for Henry (not the vacuum cleaner I hasten to add), a silicone dildo from John Thomas Toys.

Donkey Dong is a bit of a beast

John Thomas Toys once again approached me to see if I wanted to review two new designs of dildos.

I can never say no because they not only ask so nicely, but they also produce some awe-inspiring silicone dildos and stretchers.

"I got the glowing version to review, and I have to say it blew me away the first time I switched the lights off and saw its lovely green glow. I don't know what the neighbours must have thought if they saw the Medium charging on my bedroom window sill LOL."

Joanne

John Thomas Toys gave me the names, but I had no idea what they would actually look like. This was because they were so new they hadn't even added them to their website.

So with just the names, I sat back and waited for two boxes to arrive full of some nice cock for me to play with.

Like its namesake, Godzillaz is a primal beast of a ride

John Thomas Toys asked if they could send me another dildo to review. I do love their toys, and I like working with the company as well. With that in mind, of course, I said yes please.

It definitely helped when they said the name was Godzillaz. I was hoping that they would be nice enough to let me review this dildo as it looks incredible.

"On pushing more of Godzillaz inside, I feel the shaft widening's girth, filling me up nicely. The spikes and the frills were adding different sensations to the dildo. John Thomas Toys really have designed a great dildo."

Joanne

The main question was, would it be as good as it looks. I mean, just look at the pics of Godzillaz; that is some eye-watering well-defined texture there. I do like the little comment on the product page on John Thomas Toys website:

"Godzillaz is a real creature feature from the Jurassic age. Boasting spikes, a curved scaled shaft that has lizard like fans, this dong truly is out of this world!"

So let me tell you all about my encounter with Godzillaz.

The Colon Snake is both a challenge and a pleasure to use

John Thomas Toys were very concerned that I may get bored while still in lockdown and offered to send me two new dildos. This one, the Colon Snake and their Diablo's Finger Silcione Dildo.

Ok, so now I may need to get a much bigger storage area to hold them all, but I can never seem to say no.

"I have used it several times now, this is one of those sex toys that feels amazing to insert, and the feeling of fulness is hard to describe but highly arousing."

Joanne

I will admit that when John Thomas Toys said they were sending me Colon Snake, I had no idea what to expect. They had not added them to their website before I did my unboxing video. So I was stunned by what I pulled out of the box.

John Thomas Toys produce high-quality dildos of all shapes and sizes. Their designs are always unique and a heck of a lot of fun to review. Although I don't think I'll ever be able to take on the XL size of any of their range as the girth on them is incredible.

The Devils finger will really press your buttons

As soon as I was set up in my new office, John Thomas Toys asked if they could send me some more dildos to review.

I am not going to say no to a chance at getting my hands on some new dildos to review.

"As I expected, I felt every single ridge and bump along my sensitive walls. If you get the angle and dildo size right, you can even rub the claw against your g-spot."

Joanne

I am given the name but have no idea what they look like until they arrive. This is because they often come before John Thomas Toys have put them on their own website. Luckily It was easy to guess which was which when I did the unpacking video.

I was excited to try out my new studio for both videos and photos. It also helped to identify a few things that needed rethinking.

A customisable G-spot vibrator, bring it on!

Hot Octopus asked if I would like to review their new g-spot vibrator, the KURVE. I didn't need to think about the answer at all; of course, I wanted to try it out. You see, ever since reviewing the JETT from Hot Octopuss, I have been longing to feel the Trebble and Bass vibrations myself. Now was my opportunity.

I didn't have to wait for long before I answered the door to find a small box on the doorstep. After saying thank you to the delivery driver, I got my scissors out to carefully open the packaging.

"The shape is perfect for easily hitting my G-Spot while still being able to access the buttons. I love the soft part of the head as I rub it in place, but it also feels great against my internal walls and against my clit."

Joanne

I was really excited for two reasons. Firstly, I had a new vibrator to play with; oops, sorry, I mean to review, of course.

The second reason was; this would be the first review I would photograph with my new office's stone wall as the backdrop.

IT is a silicone stretcher with both a funny background story and an unusual look

John Thomas Toys were worried that I might be getting bored throughout England's third lockdown, so they let sent me a couple of toys to keep myself "busy".

I was surprised when three heavy boxes arrived. As they were a new design, I was told the names but had no idea what they would look like.

"The whole dildo is stimulation heaven, it rubs my walls wonderfully as it goes in and out. Give it a little twist and my toes were curling."

Joanne

I had to really restrain myself not to open the boxes at home before filming the unboxing video for you to watch. I must say it was not an easy feat, and so Stuntcock just locked them away :-)

While John Thomas Toys were kind enough to package the dildo's into separate boxes, I still felt sorry for the postie. Each box weighs a lot, just imagine four hefty silicone dildos in each box.

Forget the ring toss, challenge your ring

When John Thomas Toys asked if I would like some new toys to review while in yet another lockdown, of course, I said yes.

With so many weeks in lockdown, it is the perfect distraction for me. I was thrilled when I received three boxes of dildos.

"The Challenge shape is easy to start with, but as you can guess from the name, once you reach the first ring, the width expands dramatically, and the challenge begins."

Joanne

This review is for The Challenge. I am reviewing the dildos individually as I feel it would be too long to read a combined review.

Please get comfortable and get ready to hear what I thought of John Thomas Toys The Challenge dildo.

Daddy's Cock has more than meets the eye

John Thomas Toys were worried that I may get bored during the countries third lockdown. So they asked if I would like to receive some new dildos to review.

Well, lockdown can get a little boring, so of course, I said yes, please.

"The stretch is virtually immediate and extremely enjoyable. The glans is angled slightly forward to make it easy to insert, and when you look down from the glans, you see how the back arch sticks up to create a delicious ridge"

Joanne

I was surprised when three heavy boxes arrived on my doorstep a few days after being notified they had been dispatched to me.

Although I did find a label placed on the top box rather amusing and had to send out a little tweet about it. How could I find a sticker that said "Do not split" on three boxes of large dildos not funny?

A Rabbit Vibe that would give Thumper a run for his money

So Divine got in touch with me to see if I would like to review some of their new range from the #Selflove selection. I think you can guess my response :) Of course, I said yes please, as I have thoroughly enjoyed their sex toys in the past.

I then had to sit and wait for the delivery, which I will admit would be pretty dull if I did not have other things to do to distract me.

"The silky-smooth texture makes it slide in smoothly, and the shape makes it almost effortless to hold and move."

Joanne

I did not have long to wait before the package arrived at my door. Placed on my doorstep by a cheerful post person who waved as they left.

It is always exciting when I get a box of items, not knowing exactly what products are inside. It's almost like Christmas, just without the wrapping paper.

Essex Geezer, a diamond bloke with a huge cock

I do love reviewing and get very excited when I am asked to review something before it is even advertised on the companies website.

Well, this happened again with the John Thomas Toys Essex Geezer dildo. Even though I knew the name, I had no idea what it would actually look like when I agreed to review it.

"Essex Geezer is a chap that you will want more than a one night stand with. I can understand why Essex girls always seem to have a smile on their faces now."

Joanne

If you check out their website, you will see that it's impossible to guess what a product will look like until you can see it. But one thing I knew for sure was it was going to be larger than life.

I never have long to wait for John Thomas Toys to arrive after they say they are sending me something and I could hardly contain my excitement.

They say that all good things come in threes and that is true of the Tom, Dick & Zoltok dildo

Reviewing can be hard work, but it does have its fun moments. After all, I have to play with the item before I can write an honest review.

When asked if I would like to review the Tom, Dick and Zoltock toy from John Thomas Toys. It was not even live on their website, so I had no idea what it would even look like. After thinking about it for say, um a whole 5 seconds I said yes.

"Once I wiggled it inside, I found that the three separate heads rubbed along my walls beautifully. The sensation caused was terrific, then to add the three different sides was almost like adding fuel to the fire."

Joanne

I didn't have long to wait for the delivery to arrive after being told it had been dispatched. I was so excited when the doorbell rang that I nearly beat the dog to the door lol.

I will admit to being extremely surprised at the size of the box, as it was much larger than the standard ones I have received in the past.

Meet the Dick Head, we all know one, and now you can ride one

I always love it when I hear that I am being sent a new toy to review. So when I was told that I would shortly be receiving a set of John Thomas Toys latest additions I could not wait.

With a name like "Dick Head" I just knew that this was going to be a fun one and I was right.

"If you are lucky enough, (or determined enough) to get past the head, you feel the ridge of the glans, then get to enjoy the ridges and bumps of the pulled back foreskin."

Joanne

This novel toy is a stretcher, designed to help you achieve the goal of taking bigger toys and for a size queen like me, it is perfect.

So, grab some popcorn and let me tell you all about my stretching fun with the Dick Head.

Meet the Barbarian, an extraterrestrial with an appetite

I am delighted to be letting you all know about another new John Thomas Toys Dildo. Both sub'r' and I have taken one for the team as it were to get to know this beast of a dildo.

Now while reviewing this stunning piece of silicone cock, I had a trip into hospital. That meant that sub'r' got first dibs on The Barbarian, and to my surprise, she opted for the large (good girl).

"The first and most amazing features of The Barbarian is its surface textures. They feel sublime when you thrust it in and out. The raised muscles and the snakeskin surface really do work well together creating a myriad of sensations that really get me going."

Joanne

Now the good news (for me) is that I am back on form and that meant I was also able to enjoy, and I really do mean enjoy, this silicone dildo.

So, grab a drink, sit back and get comfortable as I tell you all about The Barbarian from John Thomas Toys.

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