John Thomas Toys got in touch with me to see if I fancied reviewing their latest offering of silicone dildos. As usual, I just couldn't say no.
So a few days later, I received a large, heavy box with no indication on the outside of the box as to its contents. I knew without even opening it that it was from John Thomas Toys. This was simply due to the shape, size and weight.
"I could feel each sucker rubbing the walls of my pussy, creating mesmerising feelings. The suckers grow in size as you move down the shaft, and I found myself wanting more and more."Joanne
On opening the box, I was pleasantly surprised by the latest twisted design. I was looking forward to having fun reviewing them.
I have really had a lot of time to get to know this beast of a dildo due to several problems delaying this review. But I am happy to say those are sorted now (thank you for being so understanding, JTT). So here are my thoughts on the Twisted Tentacle Dildo.
I was delighted to see a new sex toy being shown around #BBB as I was trading there. I was doubly delighted when I was asked if I wanted to review one and jumped at the chance.
The Love Hamma is quirky to say the least, and we love quirky sex toys. Why settle for the mundane when you can enjoys ex toys that put a smile on your face and are just fun.
"The Love Hamma is a vibrator for anyone who likes to keep things kinky and different, why settle for vanilla when you can make your pussy a veritable work zone. Grab the Love Hamma and get busy."sub'r'
So, I decided that as this Love Hamma is pink and that is sub'r's favourite colour, she shoudl "take on for the team" and so I let her take it home to review. After using every available opportunity to get to know it, here are her thoughts on it.
Hi, it's sub'r' here with another review for Joanne, this time it's the Love Hamma. I love my quirky toys, so I was over the moon when Joanne asked me to review it for you. So here's what I thought; I hope you enjoy it.
It's been a while since John Thomas Toys last contacted me about sending me anything to review. So I was excited when they asked if they could send me a new design they have come up with.
All I was told in advance was that the name was Kraken's Tentacle. The title gave me a rough idea of what it may look like, though, but it was still a surprise when I took them out of the box. Stunt Cock laughed when I told him its name, he said I have a lot in common with the Kraken. When I asked him what he meant, he just laughed and said we have both swallowed a lot of "seamen". He got a good jab to his ribs for that one.
"By angling the tentacle just right, I could enjoy the feel of running the suckers over my clit on every movement of the tentacle. By adding a slight twist, I found it gave some fantastic sensations."Joanne
The box when it arrived was hefty, and upon opening it, I could see why. John Thomas Toys always send me all four sizes to review; this time was no different.
A Kraken is a giant octopus type creature and the size of its tentacles needed to match its legendary reputation. These tentacles definitely do not disappoint in that regards.
I love it when we receive a package from John Thomas Toys. I know two things for sure when one tips up. Firstly it is going to be contain larger than life toys and they will be lots of fun.
Secondly, I know whatever is inside will be body-safe. Again we weren't disappointed, although we felt sorry for the posties back as this box weighs a bomb
"Mr Michelin has a look that you will no doubt recognise. I do not doubt that Mrs Michelin is one happy lady as he's very well proportioned with his recognisable rings that provide lots of intense stimulation."sub'r'
When Joanne did her unboxing video, I could almost hear myself getting wetter and wetter, so I asked if she wanted me to review this one.
I was delighted when she said yes, and so here is my review of this lovely silicone dildo from John Thomas Toys.
Organotoy is a German artisanal company created in 2011 with the plan to make high-quality sex toys. They offer some unique silicone toys that are handmade to order, and they look incredible.
I first saw the fantastic products made by Organotoy on Twitter. After commenting on the image, they contacted me to see if I would be interested in reviewing one of their products.
"The large bumps feel amazing against my pussy walls. I like to give it a slight twist to really ramp up the sensations when thrusting with it."Joanne
I really wanted a chance to see one of their products in person, so I jumped at the opportunity to check one of their dildos out.
That led to the dilemma as to who would get to try it first, so sub 'r' and I had a little discussion on who would try out this delectable treat. Unfortunately for sub 'r', I won this one (yeah, for me :p ).
We were all really looking forward to seeing this dildo upfront and personal. Even with Brexit and Covid 19, the shipping did not take as long as we thought it might.
I'm sure that the delivery person gets their daily workout when they deliver my latest batch of silicone cock from John Thomas Toys.
This one box of Edgware Trainers holds approximately 9.95kg of silicone securely inside.
"The slight squish makes a more comfortable ride for me. I enjoy the feel of my muscles clamping down on the dildo, especially during an orgasm where I love clamping down on whatever is inside my pussy."Joanne
I don't always know what will be arriving, so sometimes it's a pleasant surprise to see the contents. I will admit that occasionally I will open the box for a sneaky peek before doing the unboxing video.
No one is good enough to memorise all the different dildos and stretchers that John Thomas Toys offer. They have a massive range of huge hole stretchers and pleasers that well worth checking out.
I am once again delighted to have received some more John Thomas Toys dildos.
You can't have too many good toys, and I know that the quality of John Thomas Toys dildos are worth making room for.
"I can honestly say that this is my first time with an anatomically correct dog dong. I did feel a little intimidated with these dildos as the small is a lot larger than I expected."Joanne
When the postie arrived with two large boxes, I knew precisely who they were from. I just had no idea what the contents were.
I am always excited to open the boxes so that I can see what I've been sent. They have so much choice on their website, and I know it will be something new each time.
John Thomas Toys emailed me to check if I was happy to receive some more items to review. After I said yes, I took another look in my toy box and realised I would have to put more into temporary storage at the office/workshop.
I enjoy their products so much that I just can't say no. But hey, we are already thinking of moving somewhere larger next year so we can make room for more :-p
"Okay, so The Ripper is a somewhat intimidating stretcher. After some discussion with sub 'r', we decided that it would be used vaginally and not anally. Plus, neither of us wanted to use anything larger than the small; yes, call us both chickens if you wish."Joanne
If you are the lucky owner of any of their products, I think that you would probably realise my predicament. Would you say no to more of their fantastic silicone products?
Okay, so after the current selection had been re-jiggled, I was ready for some new additions. Plus that meant a little less room at my office/workshop, oops :-)
Before finishing the reviews for my last two dildos from John Thomas Toys, another box arrived on my doorstep.
I only receive this type of large and heavy box from one manufacturer, so this one was definitely from John Thomas Toys, and that pretty much made my day.
"After strapping her to my spanking bench, sub 'r' also thoroughly enjoyed the attention of Brutus. It was not long before he brought her to completion (after she asked for permission to cum, of course)."Joanne
I knew that this box contained a set of four silicone dildo's called Brutus. So on checking my e-mails and the John Thomas Toys website, I was very excited to take them out of the box to play with them (oops, I mean to professionally review).
But before getting my kink on with them, I had to rush straight to my new workshop to record an unboxing video and to take the review photos. All of which needed doing before I took lots of pleasure from thoroughly examining and 'cough', testing this dildo out.
Even when I am busy with various other projects and reviews, when John Thomas Toys approach me with an offer of sending me more, I just can't seem to say no.
How can I turn down great products that I get to play with? Especially when I know the quality of the dildos being sent.
"The vein textures are enough to add lots of pleasurable sensation as you work more and more inside. Once fully inserted, I relished the feeling of being full and the satisfaction of knowing I took it all - Yay for me!"Joanne
So I said yes, I would be happy to receive them. As these dildos were a brand new design, I was given the name but had no idea what they looked like. That was because they had not even put them up on their website.
This is the review for Henry (not the vacuum cleaner I hasten to add), a silicone dildo from John Thomas Toys.
John Thomas Toys once again approached me to see if I wanted to review two new designs of dildos.
I can never say no because they not only ask so nicely, but they also produce some awe-inspiring silicone dildos and stretchers.
"I got the glowing version to review, and I have to say it blew me away the first time I switched the lights off and saw its lovely green glow. I don't know what the neighbours must have thought if they saw the Medium charging on my bedroom window sill LOL."Joanne
John Thomas Toys gave me the names, but I had no idea what they would actually look like. This was because they were so new they hadn't even added them to their website.
So with just the names, I sat back and waited for two boxes to arrive full of some nice cock for me to play with.
John Thomas Toys asked if they could send me another dildo to review. I do love their toys, and I like working with the company as well. With that in mind, of course, I said yes please.
It definitely helped when they said the name was Godzillaz. I was hoping that they would be nice enough to let me review this dildo as it looks incredible.
"On pushing more of Godzillaz inside, I feel the shaft widening's girth, filling me up nicely. The spikes and the frills were adding different sensations to the dildo. John Thomas Toys really have designed a great dildo."Joanne
The main question was, would it be as good as it looks. I mean, just look at the pics of Godzillaz; that is some eye-watering well-defined texture there. I do like the little comment on the product page on John Thomas Toys website:
"Godzillaz is a real creature feature from the Jurassic age. Boasting spikes, a curved scaled shaft that has lizard like fans, this dong truly is out of this world!"
So let me tell you all about my encounter with Godzillaz.
John Thomas Toys were very concerned that I may get bored while still in lockdown and offered to send me two new dildos. This one, the Colon Snake and their Diablo's Finger Silcione Dildo.
Ok, so now I may need to get a much bigger storage area to hold them all, but I can never seem to say no.
"I have used it several times now, this is one of those sex toys that feels amazing to insert, and the feeling of fulness is hard to describe but highly arousing."Joanne
I will admit that when John Thomas Toys said they were sending me Colon Snake, I had no idea what to expect. They had not added them to their website before I did my unboxing video. So I was stunned by what I pulled out of the box.
John Thomas Toys produce high-quality dildos of all shapes and sizes. Their designs are always unique and a heck of a lot of fun to review. Although I don't think I'll ever be able to take on the XL size of any of their range as the girth on them is incredible.
As soon as I was set up in my new office, John Thomas Toys asked if they could send me some more dildos to review.
I am not going to say no to a chance at getting my hands on some new dildos to review.
"As I expected, I felt every single ridge and bump along my sensitive walls. If you get the angle and dildo size right, you can even rub the claw against your g-spot."Joanne
I am given the name but have no idea what they look like until they arrive. This is because they often come before John Thomas Toys have put them on their own website. Luckily It was easy to guess which was which when I did the unpacking video.
I was excited to try out my new studio for both videos and photos. It also helped to identify a few things that needed rethinking.
Hot Octopus asked if I would like to review their new g-spot vibrator, the KURVE. I didn't need to think about the answer at all; of course, I wanted to try it out. You see, ever since reviewing the JETT from Hot Octopuss, I have been longing to feel the Trebble and Bass vibrations myself. Now was my opportunity.
I didn't have to wait for long before I answered the door to find a small box on the doorstep. After saying thank you to the delivery driver, I got my scissors out to carefully open the packaging.
"The shape is perfect for easily hitting my G-Spot while still being able to access the buttons. I love the soft part of the head as I rub it in place, but it also feels great against my internal walls and against my clit."Joanne
I was really excited for two reasons. Firstly, I had a new vibrator to
play with; oops, sorry, I mean to review, of course.
The second reason was; this would be the first review I would photograph with my new office's stone wall as the backdrop.
John Thomas Toys were worried that I might be getting bored throughout England's third lockdown, so they let sent me a couple of toys to keep myself "busy".
I was surprised when three heavy boxes arrived. As they were a new design, I was told the names but had no idea what they would look like.
"The whole dildo is stimulation heaven, it rubs my walls wonderfully as it goes in and out. Give it a little twist and my toes were curling."Joanne
I had to really restrain myself not to open the boxes at home before filming the unboxing video for you to watch. I must say it was not an easy feat, and so Stuntcock just locked them away :-)
While John Thomas Toys were kind enough to package the dildo's into separate boxes, I still felt sorry for the postie. Each box weighs a lot, just imagine four hefty silicone dildos in each box.
When John Thomas Toys asked if I would like some new toys to review while in yet another lockdown, of course, I said yes.
With so many weeks in lockdown, it is the perfect distraction for me. I was thrilled when I received three boxes of dildos.
"The Challenge shape is easy to start with, but as you can guess from the name, once you reach the first ring, the width expands dramatically, and the challenge begins."Joanne
This review is for The Challenge. I am reviewing the dildos individually as I feel it would be too long to read a combined review.
Please get comfortable and get ready to hear what I thought of John Thomas Toys The Challenge dildo.
John Thomas Toys were worried that I may get bored during the countries third lockdown. So they asked if I would like to receive some new dildos to review.
Well, lockdown can get a little boring, so of course, I said yes, please.
"The stretch is virtually immediate and extremely enjoyable. The glans is angled slightly forward to make it easy to insert, and when you look down from the glans, you see how the back arch sticks up to create a delicious ridge"Joanne
I was surprised when three heavy boxes arrived on my doorstep a few days after being notified they had been dispatched to me.
Although I did find a label placed on the top box rather amusing and had to send out a little tweet about it. How could I find a sticker that said "Do not split" on three boxes of large dildos not funny?
So Divine got in touch with me to see if I would like to review some of their new range from the #Selflove selection. I think you can guess my response :) Of course, I said yes please, as I have thoroughly enjoyed their sex toys in the past.
I then had to sit and wait for the delivery, which I will admit would be pretty dull if I did not have other things to do to distract me.
"The silky-smooth texture makes it slide in smoothly, and the shape makes it almost effortless to hold and move."Joanne
I did not have long to wait before the package arrived at my door. Placed on my doorstep by a cheerful post person who waved as they left.
It is always exciting when I get a box of items, not knowing exactly what products are inside. It's almost like Christmas, just without the wrapping paper.
I do love reviewing and get very excited when I am asked to review something before it is even advertised on the companies website.
Well, this happened again with the John Thomas Toys Essex Geezer dildo. Even though I knew the name, I had no idea what it would actually look like when I agreed to review it.
"Essex Geezer is a chap that you will want more than a one night stand with. I can understand why Essex girls always seem to have a smile on their faces now."Joanne
If you check out their website, you will see that it's impossible to guess what a product will look like until you can see it. But one thing I knew for sure was it was going to be larger than life.
I never have long to wait for John Thomas Toys to arrive after they say they are sending me something and I could hardly contain my excitement.