Blue Balls XL 2.0 Fucking Machine Review

Written by  Jun 25, 2018

A machine that both surprised me and gave me a fantastic rodgering

I love my fucking machines and have used so many now that I am a bit of a connoisseur and I like to be pleasantly surprised by a machine's performance as that is definitely better than being underwhelmed.

Many years ago I tried a fucking machine called the Maestro, and it didn't really flick my switch having been spoilt by other better machines at the time.

"I love the way that fucking machines just never tire and they never give up. Believe me, you will be first to tap out when you can't take any more orgasms not the machine."

Joanne

I was delighted when Sexmachines.co.uk got in touch asking me if I would be interested in reviewing one of their new Blue Balls XL Version 2.0 fucking machines and I jumped at the chance to review it. Its design is very similar to the old Maestro, and I wanted to see if this one lives up to the hype about it as I have heard nothing but praise about the Blue Balls.

Sexmachines.co.uk have one of the most extensive selections of sex and fucking machines in the world, and they stock some of the best around. I really looked forward to seeing how this one performed, so read on to see what I think of it.

As usual, this fucking machine was delivered extremely quickly, and the attractive retail display box was hidden within a plain cardboard box, and then black plastic wrapping was placed around the box. This again provided an extra layer of added discretion. You can always rely on deliveries from sexmachines.co.uk arriving quickly and discreetly.

I could hardly contain my excitement when opening the packaging as it is always a real treat to try a new fucking machine. I had to force myself to take my time and do some unboxing pics so you can see how everything arrives neatly packaged in rigid polystyrene foam which protects everything in transit from sexmachines.co.uk to you.

Image showing the retail packaging and transit box of the Blue Balls XL 2.0
The fucking machine arrives very discreetly with the retail display box concealed in an outer box ans wrapped in black packaging film

The retail display box features a lot of product information and lets you know that this machine comes with a dildo, an anal probe, a male pussy masturbator and a Vac-u-lock adaptor which means you can use any vac-u-lock dildo which is fantastic as the range of this type of dildos is staggering.

You literally get something for everyone no matter what your gender. The first thing you see when you open the box is a single sheet of instructions, and my first thought was that isn't very good. I was wrong though. Assembly and operation are so easy, I didn't need the instructions at all. You get an Allen key tool and seven screws in a bag, and that is all you need to assemble this machine. Assembly takes less than five minutes, it really was a pleasure to see how easy it all fits together and how quickly you can strip it down for storage again.

Image showing the dildos and other attachments held securely in the top layer of packaging
The polystyrene packaging holds the machine and the four attachments securely

The main body and its legs are pre-assembled, and all you need to do is align the holes in the legs with the holes in the solid base. Then use four of the screws to secure the legs in place. Next, you use three screws to fit the circular rotary arm guard in place on the motor's gearbox, simple. Finally, slide the thrust rod through the bearing block and install the arm at its end on the output shaft on the gearbox. There is a flat on the shaft, and an Allen headed screw on the rotating arm, just line them both up and tighten the screw to secure the arm.

You are then ready to fit whatever attachment you want to the end of the thrust rod. You get an 8"/20.3cm extension shaft with a locking knurled nut on the end, this directly screws onto the thrust rod to give you more clearance between you and the machine's body. I opted for the Vac-u-lock adaptor so that I could use some of my favourite dildos. You get a little tub of graphite grease included, and this is to lubricate the linear bearing for the thrust rod to reduce wear and noise. Place a bit of grease on the thrust rod on either side of the bearing, and as the machine thrusts, it will draw the grease into the bearing block.

Image showing the fucking machines components laid out on the bed
While it might look a bit daunting, you can put this fucking machine together in under five minutes

The controls are so simple to useThe control box features a rotary speed control knob which also acts as an on/off switch, the cable has a USB plug on the end, and this is fitted into the small control box mounted to the body of the machine. Then all you have to do is plug the power supply into this control box and then plug the power lead into a mains socket. You are then ready to go.

Assembly took me less than five minutes, and I was delighted with the quality of the components and how well everything fitted together. One of the best features of this machine is the height and angle adjustment mechanism which arrives fully assembled which is great as it is quite complicated, featuring four locking knobs and a height adjustment wheel.

I really like this system as you can quickly adjust the height of the machine (up to 15"/38cm) using the large adjustment wheel and you can set it at any angle from vertical to below horizontal, and no other machine in this price bracket that I have reviewed can match that level of flexibility. Once you have set the height and angle of thrust, you lock everything up again using the four locking knobs. It's a simple system that is really effective.

Image showing the adjusting mechanism and range of angles of thrust
It is so easy to raise the platform and use the machine at any angle

You did read that right, you can set this machine up to operate vertically which is excellent for some standing BDSM play. Think of a submissive restrained to a cross or a suspension bar and you can imagine some kinky possibilities I am sure. You can use this fantastic machine standing, sitting, laid on your back or even doggy style, it is incredibly flexible, and I have to salute the manufacturer Diva on coming up with a fantastic design that allows up to 140 degrees of adjustment.

Image showing the fucking machine adjusted for vertical thrusting
I just love the fact that this machine can be used in the standing position which is great for BDSM play

First impressions were excellent, quality components, easy to assemble, lots of play opportunities and an excellent selection of attachments. So let's talk about them next.

Firstly you get a 6"/15.2cm phallic beige dildo that has a vac-u-lock hole, this is a nice dildo with some 'squish', and this makes it comfortable to use on a fucking machine where you need flexible dildos as you will end up squirming on the end of it. It is made out of TPR.

Next, you get a 6"/15.2cm silicone anal probe which again has a vac-u-lock hole in its base. It features a gently tapered shape with a nicely rounded end to aid insertion. Halfway down the tapered shaft, there is a gully running around the dildo, and this feels amazing when thrusting in and out of your anus.

The next attachment is a TPR male masturbator with the orifice designed to look like a pussy, you also get a silicone band which can be fitted around it to tighten up the orifice to give you more sensations when it slides up and down a penis. This attachment screws onto the thrust rod.

Image showing the small clearly labeled control box
The brains of the machine is this small control box with sockets that are clearly labeled

Lastly, you get a black Vac-u-lock adaptor, and without a doubt, this is the best type of adaptor as it opens up your play to all of the dildos and masturbators designed around the vac-u-lock mounting system.

The vac-u-lock system allows you to change dildos in seconds to let you to change your play without losing the moment.

Top Tip: Put some corn starch or vac-u-lock release powder into the holes in vac-u-lock dildos to help make their removal an easy process. This just makes breaking the vacuum seal much easier, your dildos will still be held securely, but you can change them quickly.

You can make this machine thrust at up to 30RPM and using the adjusting knob on the rotating arm you can set the depth of thrust at up to 8"/20.3cm which is better than most machines so that is another fantastic bonus that you get with the Blue Balls XL 2.0, the 1/2hp motor also delivers plenty of thrust with a torque of 40-in-lbs.

Image showing the thrust length adjuster on the rotating arm
The depth of thrust is easy to adjust with this adjustment mechanism giving you upto 8"/20.3cm of thrust

This machine weighs just 13.1kg, and with the four rubber feet when it is placed on a flat surface, it doesn't have a tendency to walk. This is a stable machine that really has made me sit up and take notice.

So enough about the statistics and how to put it together, you no doubt want to know my opinion of how it compares to other machines in use. Is this a machine that I would recommend over the others I have reviewed?

Performance

I have used this machine a lot (I am proud to say) over the last three weeks and sub'r' has also had the pleasures of its administrations. This is a machine that packs a real punch, the high torque 24V motor means that it is capable of stopping with a dildo deep inside you and then starting up again smoothly.

Setting it up is so easy, and when using it, you can just lay back with the speed controller in hand and just enjoy the thrusting as you start off slowly and then speed up as you get closer to an orgasm. You can put the controller down and then your hands are free to use additional toys like a vibrator, wand or even just play with your clitoris or breasts. I love this style of hands-free fun. It's a nice lazy way of masturbating but rest assured while you lay back and enjoy yourself the Blue Balls is working its hardest to give you a deep hard fuck and orgasms on a fucking machine are wild. I often squirt, and so does sub'r'.

Fucking machines lend themselves to BDSM play as well so throw in some restraints and a blindfold, and you can really crank up the kink levels. Give the controls to someone else, and you can have them take you on the ride of your life. I love the way that fucking machines just never tire and they never give up. Believe me, you will be first to tap out when you can't take any more orgasms not the machine.

Image showing the machine set up ready for use
This fucking machine is quick and easy to set up and use

I really enjoyed how quickly you can change from shallow to deep thrusts just by adjusting the rotating arm and how quickly you can swap between attachments.

I obviously had to tease stunt cock with the pussy masturbator, and he loved having it sliding up and down his erect cock. Use lots of water-based lube such as Sliquid H2O or Secret Play Natural when using a fucking machine as the sensations that can be delivered at 300RPM are incredible.

The Blue Balls XL 2.0 is a very quiet machine, at slow speeds, it is almost silent, but it gets a little noisier as you speed it up. Even at full speed, you won't hear it in the next room. Use the graphite grease to keep the bearing block lubricated as most of the noise comes from here.

After my first session on the Blue Balls XL 2.0, I knew that this was a machine that had been entirely improved in the light of user feedback. It is a fantastic machine and no doubt it will become a best seller due to its advanced features and the fact that it is very competitively priced. It costs £439 which is way less than machines with comparative performance. You can even opt for a 3 year extended warranty.

I have no problem in giving this fucking machine a solid recommendation for anyone looking for a machine packed with features and that performs very well indeed.

The Blue Balls XL 2.0 Fucking Machine from @buysexmachines is a machine that has to be experienced, it just goes on, and on, and on. Click to Tweet

Image showing the machine in for use
The Blue Balls XL 2.0 Fucking Machineis so much fun to use

Key Features

Key features:

  • Easy adjust height and angle of thrust
  • Stroke speed - 0-300RPM
  • Stroke Length - upto 8"/20.3cm
  • Power: 110V - 240V (all countries)
  • Horsepower: 1/2HP, Torque: 40-in-lbs
  • Easy assembly with tool supplied
  • Tilt frame adjusts 140 degrees from horizontal, to vertical, to downward angles
  • 1 Year warranty with 3 years optional warranty available
  • CE approved and ROHS compliant
  • Quality components

Final Thoughts

I love the Blue Balls XL 2.0, it is a machine that works hard, performs well and is quick and easy to set up. The range of angle adjustments is fantastic, and this gives you more play opportunities than most other machines, there are not many capable of being used in the standing position.

It has plenty of power, and it is very quiet even when on full power, this makes it a discreet machine. Couple this with how easy it is to strip down for storage, making it a machine you can use in a busy household.

I love the design, the build quality is very good, and the components are all powder coated for corrosion resistance. The four attachments cover all genders, and that is important, it gives you great play options right out of the box.

I can see this being a best seller for sexmachines.co.uk and I thank them for giving me the opportunity to review it for them.

I have no problem in giving this a solid recommendation.

Joanne's rating

Overall
Design
Features
Functionality
Ease Of Use
Price

Where Can I Get One From?

Sexmachines.co.uk the uk's largest selection of sex and fucking machinesGrab one of these fun fucking machines from sexmachines.co.uk for £528 which is a bargain price for a machine that is as much fun to use as this one is.

Sexmachines.co.uk have an amazing selection of fucking and sex machines for sale and all are available for immediate dispatch.

Check them out and don’t forget to tell them that Joanne says "Hi".

Disclosure

Disclaimer - I was sent this machine to review free of charge and this has in no way affected the outcome of this review. This post contains affiliate links and if you purchase something when you follow one of these links I may receive a small commission at no cost to you. For more information check out my disclosure page.

Additional Info

  • Overall Rating: 9.6
Joanne Summers

Sex Blogger, reviewer, dildo afficianado, kinky quimsticking, electrosex loving mum.

I've been reviewing sex toys and adult products for the last seven years and I love doing what I do. Recently I have been designing my own range of e-stim electrodes.

If you find my reviews and articles interesting please leave a comment for me on them, I love reading feedback about them. Or alternatively you could Buy Me A Coffee, wink, wink.

2 comments

  • Curious Cravings
    Comment Link Curious Cravings Monday, 27 January 2020 18:11

    I live in Texas, USA. Is there a US distributor?

  • Joanne Summers
    Comment Link Joanne Summers Monday, 27 January 2020 21:41

    You can get a version of it at Kens Twisted Mind, just google "Kens Twisted Mind KTM-214", it actually looks to be sturdier than this one too.

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