Displaying items by tag: VacuLock

Blue Balls XL 2.0 Fucking Machine Review

A machine that both surprised me and gave me a fantastic rodgering

I love my fucking machines and have used so many now that I am a bit of a connoisseur and I like to be pleasantly surprised by a machine's performance as that is definitely better than being underwhelmed.

Many years ago I tried a fucking machine called the Maestro, and it didn't really flick my switch having been spoilt by other better machines at the time.

"I love the way that fucking machines just never tire and they never give up. Believe me, you will be first to tap out when you can't take any more orgasms not the machine."

Joanne

I was delighted when Sexmachines.co.uk got in touch asking me if I would be interested in reviewing one of their new Blue Balls XL Version 2.0 fucking machines and I jumped at the chance to review it. Its design is very similar to the old Maestro, and I wanted to see if this one lives up to the hype about it as I have heard nothing but praise about the Blue Balls.

Sexmachines.co.uk have one of the most extensive selections of sex and fucking machines in the world, and they stock some of the best around. I really looked forward to seeing how this one performed, so read on to see what I think of it.

Caesar® 3.0 Love Machine - Fucking Machine Review

All hail Caesar. No, not the salad dressing, the Fucking Machine

This is a fucking machine that I have had my eyes on for a long time. It is now in its third design iteration, and improvements are continually being made to the design to improve its performance.

I was delighted when the lovely people over at sexmachine.co.uk got in touch asking if I would like to review one for them. As you can imagine, I almost fell off my chair in my haste to reply with a huge "Yes please".

"Once the dildo was inside me, I could just relax and enjoy the rhythmic fucking that I received, and on its highest setting, it ripped an orgasm out of me in quick order."

Joanne

This is the fourth machine that I have reviewed for them, you can see the others here. It was sent to me for free in exchange for a fair and honest evaluation of its performance and this will not affect the outcome of this review.

One of my primary interests in this machine is its unique leg arrangements which are unlike anything I have reviewed before. So read on to see what I think of this machines performance.

Hercules Silicone Vac-u-lock Dildo From Godemiche

A dildo from the Gods, the Hercules as its name suggests is power encarnate

There aren't that many dildo artisans in the UK, but Godemiche is one of them. Run by Adam and Monika they produce a fantastic range of dildos and butt plugs in body-safe silicone.

I have been fortunate in the past to have reviewed the Adam Silicone Dildo and The Peg Anal Dildo for Godemiche, the Peg is also a fantastic beginners butt plug by the way.

"A feature I love about this dildo is the fact that it is uncircumcised. This is the first dildo that I have owned that has an apparent foreskin, it's half withdrawn, and this makes the head fascinating to look at."

Joanne

I was delighted then when Ian from fmachinefun.co.uk asked if I would be interested in reviewing a Hercules for Godemiche. A version of the Hercules with a Vac-u-lock hole in flesh is now in stock at FmachineFun, and Ian thought it would be nice to hear my thoughts on it.

So as you can imagine, I was delighted to be able to review this behemoth of a dildo, and I was even more surprised when I got to see its fantastic colours when it arrived. So without further ado, here are my thoughts on the Hercules Dildo.

uFUC PRO v.2 Fucking Machine Review

A fucking machine that was so much fun to get to know - intimately.

With a myriad of fucking machines on the market, it is always hard to work out what is good or merely a waste of money. I love reviewing sex machines as it means that there is more information out there for customers to make informed decisions before parting with their hard-earned cash.

I was therefore delighted when Sexmachines.co.uk got in touch asking for another impartial review of one of the best selling machines, the uFuc Pro.

"It has a lot of power, even managing to start a double ended dildo slowly when it was fully inserted after I had stopped it on purpose. Some cheap machines don't have the torque to do that, and you go from stop to high speed, but this one is smooth and fantastic. I was genuinely impressed."

Joanne

I jumped at the chance of reviewing another machine for them, and they sent me this one in exchange for a fair and impartial review.

So without letting anything out of the bag read on to find out if this one is a keeper or just a wannabee performer.

Willie Wanka mk II Fantasy Fucking Machine Review

The Willie Wanka is a pussy and ass pleaser

As you can tell by the domain name of my site I have a real passion for fucking and sex machines. There is something magical about using one and feeling the raw power and unwavering performance that will outlast even the most ardent rider.

The biggest problem with sex and fucking machines are their cost which was one of the reasons that I set up my site. I wanted to review sexmachines so that people could make informed choices before spending their hard earned money.

"It takes a lot of torque to overcome the resistance of a buried dildo and this machines copes with that in its stride."

Joanne

But the high costs mean that it isn't often that I get to review a new fucking machine, but it's always a huge treat when I do so. I have reviewed some of the most expensive sex machines on the market. However, it is the cheaper machines, the entry ones if you like that interest me as they are affordable options to enter the world of mechanical sex.

I was therefore delighted when the lovely people over at sexmachines.co.uk got in touch asking if I would be interested in reviewing the Willie Wanka mk II fucking machine for them. I jumped at the chance (obviously), and they sent me this machine for free in exchange for a fair and honest review of it. So here are my thoughts on this fun looking machine.

Review Of The Seahorse Dildo From Mr Hankeys Toys

This textured beast of a dildo will really make your eyes pop

As you may already know I'm a bit of a texture queen when it comes to my dildos. I like something that is going to stimulate and challenge my vagina (or my anus) when I play. So you can imagine my delight when Mr Hankey sent me this incredible looking fantasy dildo to review.

This is the toy to get if you like your texture and prefer to actually feel a toy moving in and out of your holes. Smooth toys don't give you that intense level of stimulation. You can feel and savour every bump, ridge and indentation as you thrust it in and out.

Joanne

I could hardly contain my excitement when I opened up the package to see what I had been sent to review. This has to be the weirdest and most textured object that my Foof has ever had the pleasure of tackling. I couldn't wait to get started with my review of it.

After three weeks of tackling this behemoth I'm ready to let you all know what it feels like. Together with whether or not it's worth recommending as let's face it, this is not a normal looking dildo by any stretch of your imagination.

CutlerX Silicone Dildo Review from Mr Hankeys Toys

This is the dildo that almost broke my pussy

Just when I thought I'd met my match when I reviewed the Anaconda from MrHankeysToys.com as it was shall we say a very nice and tight fit, I have yet again been given another challenge and that is in the form of the CutlerX silicone dildo. This mind-blowing dildo is actually a life-cast from the male pornstar CutlerX and to be honest I don't know how he stays conscious when he gets an erection as his penis is simply huge - as you will see in this review.

The trick is to warm up for it and to use lots and lots of lube replacing it as and when necessary. I know that a lot of guys will enjoy this one anally but it's just too big for me back there and so I'll just stick with having my pussy filled by CutlerX.

Joanne

This is the third dildo that I have reviewed for Mr Hankeys Toys and I have another one tucked away to review once my vagina recovers from its onslaught by CutlerX. So read on to find out how much I enjoyed this phallus and you can then decide if you are upto the challenge that is the CutlerX dildo.

Anaconda Silicone Dildo From Mr Hankeys Toys

The Phallic Shaped Vac-u-Lock Dildo That Will Make Your Eyes Water

After I had reviewed the Centaur Dildo from Mr Hankey's Toys I was pretty confident that I would enjoy this dildo and more importantly that it would fit inside my Foof. This is another huge dildo and it's actually the small, this dildo is designed for, well shall we just say the lover of all things "fulfilling".

It's made in the USA by proud silicone dildo creator Mr Hankey's Toys and the Anaconda is one of many amazing examples of big dildos on his site that are well worth checking out. My eyes are constantly drawn to the CutlerX - swoon. If you crave the bigger and longer dildos then this site is definitely for you, some of the designs are fantasy ones and others are incredibly realistic, this one sits between those two genres of dildo.

This is my second dildo from Mr Hankey's Toys and I am blown away by the product, some of the other dildos on his site look incredible and the CutlerX which is a life-cast dildo has definitely caught my attention and lets just say that I have a soft spot for it.

Joanne

So is this dildo with its tapered tip and squashed cross section something to rave or rage about? Read on to find out what I thought of it after spending a month getting to know it.

Centaur Silicone Dildo Review From Mr Hankeys Toys

Meet Centaur, From The Man With A Horses Cock

I have to admit that I am pretty chuffed with myself over this review. Not for its style or my writing ability but simply because I managed to get this behemoth inside my foof (pussy). It is huge and whilst this one is the small size it's still not for the feint hearted. It's made in the USA by proud silicone oficionado Mr Hankey's Toys and the Centaur dildo certainly has good company on his site.

I can quite honestly say that all of the dildos on the site are eye wateringly desirable (well maybe with the exception of the poop dildo) especially if you like to be filled to the brim with body safe silicone in whatever hole you fancy stretching and filling.

The detailing on the dildo, its head and the shaft is simply stunning with lots of gentle textures and it has a head that gives a nice pop as it enters you. It leaves you in no doubt that you are being penetrated by something large.

Joanne

I was delighted when Mr Hankey agreed to send me a small Centaur dildo together with a small Anaconda dildo (check out my review of that which will come out after my vagina recovers from this one). As you can already tell, this dildo is a force to be reckoned with and whilst it is the biggest thing that I have so far tackled, is it something that I could recommend to others. Well you will have to read on to find out the answer to this burning question.

Doc Johnson Vac-U-Lock 8 Inch Realistic Cock

Doc Johnson Vac-U-Lock 8 Inch Realistic Cock - Flesh Coloured

I was sent this 8 Inch Dildo by SexToys.co.uk in exchange for an honest and frank review of it. At the time of writing this review it costs just £38.95 which is about par with the price on most sites that I checked.

This is another dildo that I have used with my F-Machine Pro and it's now a firm (snigger) favourite attachment for that machine.

This Dildo has both the length, texture and looks to really get my juices flowing. It's modelled from a real cock and the detail is superb, I particularly like the well definded head that feels great as it 'pops' past your vaginal opening. The balls give something for you to hold onto and squeeze, they feel amazing banging against you if you use it on a Fucking Machine.

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