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Joanne's Sex Machine and Sex Toy Reviews

Welcome to my site, I hope that you enjoy my reviews and articles. I have a fascination with sex toys and in particular sex and fucking machines and I have a lot of fun doing what I do. I hope it shows in my reviews and articles. I love hearing from my readers so don't be shy, post a comment or get in touch.

Joanne xxx

Beginners guide to sex machines
My most popular sex toy reviews
Reasons why women should masturbate regularly
Guide to buying your first sex toy
  • Vibease Remote Control Panty Vibrator Review

    Vibease Remote Control Panty Vibrator Review

    Get Ready For A Party In Your Panties I had to ask my friend 'Google' what the Vibease was when I was approached to see if I would be interested in reviewing one for the manufacturer and it seriously got me interested. It's a remote controlled vibrator that you slip Read More
  • Aslan Leather Driver Strap On Harness from Uberkinky

    Aslan Leather Driver Strap On Harness from Uberkinky

    Aslan Leather Driver Strap On Harness from Uberkinky I was delighted when Uberkinky asked me if I would be interested in reviewing a strap on harness for them and of courseI said that I would be delighted to. I mean, who would turn down the offer of a quality leather Read More
  • Sweet Sensation Booty Plug Review - SoDivine

    Sweet Sensation Booty Plug Review - SoDivine

    Sweet Sensation Booty Plug Review - SoDivine I am not normally a big fan of butt plugs but when I received the press release from So Divine about their new addition to their range of sex toy - the Sweet Sensation Booty Plug there was just something about it that caught my Read More
  • Double Electro Pinwheel E-Stim Electrode From e-stim.co.uk

    Double Electro Pinwheel E-Stim Electrode From e-stim.co.uk

    Double Electro Pinwheel E-Stim Electrode From e-stim.co.uk Well my cheeky nature has landed me in the hot seat this time. Whilst chatting with another sextoy reviewer (the delightful @brunettereviews on twitter) the conversation came round to pinwheels and our love of electrosex so I cheekily mentioned to Mick at E-Stim Systems Read More
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Get Ready For A Party In Your Panties

I had to ask my friend 'Google' what the Vibease was when I was approached to see if I would be interested in reviewing one for the manufacturer and it seriously got me interested. It's a remote controlled vibrator that you slip down the front of your panties and it has so many features that I had to get one in to review. Now if you believe the hype this is one seriously clever sex toy but did it live up to my expectations when it arrived? Read on to find out.

If you are looking for a clit stim only toy which allows for hands-free use, is super quiet, powerful, with lots of vibration options that can be used outside the bedroom and your partner can even get involved even when they are away from you then this is the one to get.

Joanne
I was delighted when I got to unbox it as the no frills packaging looks amazing with its simple pink and turquoise colour scheme and as you never get a second chance at first impressions this review was off to a good start. The box sleeve is packed with information and it took me a while to get through it all. Then it was on with the unboxing and this is often one of my favourite parts of the reviewing process.

Saturday, 08 April 2017 14:22

So Divine Sweetest Taboo Magic Wand

The Sweetest Taboo Magic Wand Is One For My Bedside Drawer

It isn't often that a company sends me three new sex toys to review and so I was delighted when So Divine sent me one of their Sweetest Taboo Magic Wands together with a silicone coated vibrator and a bullet vibe to review. Watch out for my reviews of the other two toys in the very near future as this review is focussed squarely on the amazing Sweetest Taboo Magic Wand.

I like to read up on new toys prior to their arrival and the dual motors in this wand really caught my attention. What a great idea! You will see why later in the review but needless to say I couldn't wait for it to arrive to get my hands (and other parts of my anatomy of course) on it.

By far its best feature is its ability to be two vibrators rolled into one. This is one sex toy that is staying in my bedside drawer and it will take for something pretty spectacular to come along to evict it from there.

I love magic wand style vibrators for their sheer power and usually have no trouble enjoying some very quick and powerful orgasms but how would this wand compare to my others and is it one to recommend? You can rest assured that I have put in a lot of time getting to know it (purely in the interest of science you know LOL) and feel very qualified to comment on both its performance and value, so without further ado lets get on with the review.

Wednesday, 04 January 2017 11:32

Vibrator Review - Crescendo

A Great Vibrator With A Twist - The Crescendo

For over a year I have been following the development of the Crescendo from Mysteryvibe.com. This amazing sex toy features six motors and the ability to be bent into unique shapes to enhance its ability to get to the right spots. The build up to its launch and the development were amazing to follow. The developers were completely open with the process and they engaged with bloggers at a very early stage to both inform and to raise awareness of their product. From concept to vibrator has taken them a long five years but the time taken in research and development has been worth it.

The vibrations are quite rumbly which is something that I like but others might not enjoy them as much. This toy is a dichotomy, it was designed by the nicest of people as a toy for everyone to enjoy and it feels like it is trying to be the jack of all trades rather than being the best in a particular area.

I have actually spent four weeks getting to know the Crescendo and to find out what I think about this revolutionary sextoy read on for a frank account of its performance and features.

A Silky Smooth Rabbit Vibe That Packs A Punch

I was delighted when I was contacted by the nice people from IMToy who asked if I would like to review one of the sex toys from their latest range - the Zoo collection. Now the unusual name piqued my interest so I immediately went over to their website to learn more about this new range and I was surprised to see six new sex toys in the offering. The Rhino really caught my eye for its elegant curves and simple looks so I opted to review one of those but I must admit that I wish I had them all as they look sublime.

The whole range in their pastel pink colour looks really nice and there is something there for everyone, and yes there is even a male masturbator there as well called the Manta Ray that is definitely worth checking out.

They sent me a Rhino to review free of charge in exchange for a fair and honest review, this will not affect the outcome of my review in any way as all of my reviews are written from the heart and are an accurate account of how I found the sex toy.

I insert it fully then close my thighs trapping it and I can then gently thrust my hips for some amazing sensations and it leaves my hands free to operate the App.

Well the Rhino certainly looks the part but can it stand up to the other Rabbit Vibes on the market and more importantly just how good is it? Read on to find out...

Wednesday, 06 July 2016 09:00

Vibrator Review - Svakom Keri

A Small But Powerful Vibrator - The Keri

When I visited the ETO (Erotic Trade Only) show this year in Birmingham I cam across the Svakom stand and really enjoyed getting my hands on some of their newest vibrators. If you have been reading my blog for a while you will know that I have reviewed the Siime Camera Vibrator and had a lot fo fun doing so. I was asked if I would like to review the Svakom Keri and of course I jumped at the chance and so Svakom have sent me one to review free of charge in exchange for an unbiased review in conjunction with one of their Amazon retailers.

I really enjoyed the Siime and the luxury feel of this toy from Svakom and so I was delighted to be able to put it to the test. Having felt its power on my fingers at the show I couldn't wait to feel what that power felt like elsewhere if you know what I mean (if you don't then you soon will if do you carry on reading).

So how did the Svakom Keri perform? Read on as I cover everything from delivery to orgasm to hear what I really think of it.