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Joanne's Sex Machine and Sex Toy Reviews

Welcome to my site, I hope that you enjoy my reviews and articles. I have a fascination with sex toys and in particular sex and fucking machines and I have a lot of fun doing what I do. I hope it shows in my reviews and articles. I love hearing from my readers so don't be shy, post a comment or get in touch.

Joanne xxx

Beginners guide to sex machines
My most popular sex toy reviews
Reasons why women should masturbate regularly
Guide to buying your first sex toy
  • Vibease Remote Control Panty Vibrator Review

    Vibease Remote Control Panty Vibrator Review

    Get Ready For A Party In Your Panties I had to ask my friend 'Google' what the Vibease was when I was approached to see if I would be interested in reviewing one for the manufacturer and it seriously got me interested. It's a remote controlled vibrator that you slip Read More
  • Aslan Leather Driver Strap On Harness from Uberkinky

    Aslan Leather Driver Strap On Harness from Uberkinky

    Aslan Leather Driver Strap On Harness from Uberkinky I was delighted when Uberkinky asked me if I would be interested in reviewing a strap on harness for them and of courseI said that I would be delighted to. I mean, who would turn down the offer of a quality leather Read More
  • Sweet Sensation Booty Plug Review - SoDivine

    Sweet Sensation Booty Plug Review - SoDivine

    Sweet Sensation Booty Plug Review - SoDivine I am not normally a big fan of butt plugs but when I received the press release from So Divine about their new addition to their range of sex toy - the Sweet Sensation Booty Plug there was just something about it that caught my Read More
  • Double Electro Pinwheel E-Stim Electrode From e-stim.co.uk

    Double Electro Pinwheel E-Stim Electrode From e-stim.co.uk

    Double Electro Pinwheel E-Stim Electrode From e-stim.co.uk Well my cheeky nature has landed me in the hot seat this time. Whilst chatting with another sextoy reviewer (the delightful @brunettereviews on twitter) the conversation came round to pinwheels and our love of electrosex so I cheekily mentioned to Mick at E-Stim Systems Read More
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Doc Johnson Vac-U-Lock 8 Inch Realistic Cock - Flesh Coloured

I was sent this 8 Inch Dildo by SexToys.co.uk in exchange for an honest and frank review of it. At the time of writing this review it costs just £38.95 which is about par with the price on most sites that I checked.

This is another dildo that I have used with my F-Machine Pro and it's now a firm (snigger) favourite attachment for that machine.

This Dildo has both the length, texture and looks to really get my juices flowing. It's modelled from a real cock and the detail is superb, I particularly like the well definded head that feels great as it 'pops' past your vaginal opening. The balls give something for you to hold onto and squeeze, they feel amazing banging against you if you use it on a Fucking Machine.

Tuesday, 17 March 2015 19:00

Doc Johnson Vac-U-Lock 8" Classic Dildo

Doc Johnson Vac-U-Lock 8" Classic Dildo

I bought this dildo from Sex Toys primarily to use on my F-Machine Pro but it is also a lot of fun to use on its own. I got it from Sex Toys.

This is a nicely sculptured dildo that carries a lot of surface texture that feels great in use. The veins down its side come into their own when this dildo is used on a Fucking Machine, feeling sublime in use. It's an ideal size if you don't want a large toy but one that still fills you.

At the time of writing the 8" Classic Vac-u-lock Dildo costs just £11.99 which is great value for money.

Thursday, 12 March 2015 00:00

Doc Johnson Vac-U-Lock Kong Dildo

Doc Johnson Vac-U-Lock Kong Dildo

This is another dildo that I bought for use with my F-Machine Pro and it is by far my favourite attachment for that machine. I got it from www.FMachineFun.co.uk.

At the time of writing this the Kong Vac-u-lock Dildo costs £42.50 and I have the flesh coloured model.

This toy is just the perfect size and texture for me. Its girth is fantastic for long sessions of being ploughed by the fucking machine without getting sore and it simply takes your breath away. The only funny thing about this toy is the little tuffts of hair on its base - they look a bit weird.

Doc Johnson Vac-U-Lock Jeff Stryker Realistic

I bought this dildo primarily to use on my F-Machine Pro but I like it so much I often use it on its own. I got it from Love Honey.

At the time of writing the Jeff Stryker Vac-u-lock Dildo costs just £38.99 which sounds a lot but this thing is huge LOL.

Where do I begin? I could say that it gave me the ride of my life on the fucking machine, or I could say that I have never felt so full up all of which would be true. It really is a beast, the moment I felt it parting my lips and stretching me wide as it slid in I actually had a deep involuntary intake of breath. I couldn’t believe how good and filling it felt deep inside me.