About Me

About Me

Mystery LadyI'm Joanne and welcome to my site if you are new here. I am the writer, editor, re-editor, spelling corrector and creator of this my little corner of the internet - sexmachinereviews.co.uk.

It's a blog that I hope will actually help people as I share my personal experiences of the products you see on this site. I'm very sexually liberated and have my kinks, but that wasn't always the case. My sexual tastes and experience has grown over time, and I now have a well-balanced view of sexuality, and I enjoy exploring the fringes.

One of the most significant kinks and loves which I am sharing on this site is my love of mechanical sex. Yes, I like sex and fucking machines.

I am a married mother of two who is in her 40's (cough you aren't getting a closer number than that). I could, of course, be described as a 'Cougar' or 'MILF' and I would wear that label with pride.

In 2015 I decided to grab the bull by the horns and do something different with my spare time - hence this blog. I can't believe that it has now been running for three years. It has grown, and I have grown with it.

I had and still have no writing qualifications, or for that matter, web design experience and so this site was a very steep learning curve. I am glad that everyone has stuck with me though as today it is so much more than I ever could have wished for when I embarked on this project.

This is my first blog, but my sexual journey has been a long one indeed. I used to be a good girl, but now I love it a little kinky. I have had my ups and downs like everyone else, but every setback that I have encountered has made me stronger for it. The knocks I have endured over the years have also made me more determined to be open about my sexuality.

My body has also had its knocks and dinks over the years, and I struggle with mild arthritis in my hands and wrists. This is one of the reasons why I enjoy using sex machines so much - they are hands-free.

I often provide pretty graphic accounts of what I get up to while doing reviews, so they are not for the shy. But if I like something, I say so, and if I don't like something, then I will tell you why and that is important as while something might not work for me it may work for you. We are all different, and that is something to be celebrated.

I'm in absolute awe of some of the more prominent sex bloggers out there. I will continue to forge links and friendships with them as I progress along the long road that is ahead of me. I am fortunate now though to be in a position to help and mentor new bloggers, and I relish advising my peers.

What do I hope to achieve with this blog? Well, I hope to be able to help others expand their sexual knowledge and experiences. I also hope that along the road I can become a better person for having done so.

Mystery Lady on her ShockspotI love writing sex toy reviews and intend to highlight the excitement and enjoyment that sex and fucking machines and their dildos can bring to your sex life. As well as all sorts of other sex accessories and items of course.

I'm looking forward to any comments that I get so don't be shy, let me know what you think good and bad.

Oh and that's quite a likeness up there - just saying ;-)

Now What?

Want to check out the reviews? - Start by checking out my sitemap it will show you everything that I have written so far or try a quick search.

Latest Reviews

May 18, 2018

Bijoux Indescrets Flamboyant Body Jewelery Purple And Pink

in Other Reviews
Your nipples and foof will have never looked so good when all blinged up I am not one for bling, usually, but when I saw the Bijoux Indescrets Body Jewelry, I was filled with curiosity and desire. I had to see how sexy they would look and as you get a pair of… Read More
May 15, 2018

Book Review - BDSM A Guide To The Explorers Of Extreme Eroticism

in Other Reviews
This is one book that I will keep refering to I don't often review books, but this one caught my eye when I was approached by the author Ayzad. Well, it's a guide that covers almost every conceivable erotic, kinky and BDSM fetish that you can think of, so how… Read More
May 11, 2018

BDSM Puppy Slave Collar Review

in BDSM Kit Reviews
This stunning collar is not just good for puppy play I have received another fantastic… Read More

Recent Articles

February 10, 2018 936

EStim Resources

This page is the hub of everything estim related on this site Three years ago the amazing guys over at E-Stim Systems got in touch asking if I would be interested in reviewing some of their e-stim equipment. I had to be honest as I had never even heard of… Read More
November 11, 2017 4246

The Sybian Riders Guide

Getting the most bang for your buck with a Sybian The Sybian is a legend in its own right, for 30 years it has been providing hard orgasms to women all around the world. It's without a doubt the most powerful vibrator that I have ever had the privilege of… Read More
Nov 02, 2017 2697

A Guide To Nipple Play

I love nipple play, it is the gender free sex organ made for loving Well, they're made… Read More

Latest Blog Posts

May 01, 2018

I'm Attending Eroticon 2019 - But I Might Need Some Help

in Blog
I'm So Looking Forward To Upping My Game I will be attending Eroticon 2019 - decision made. I almost got there in 2018 until I had a bad fall just prior to it and I ended up in hospital for a week with bad head injuries. Next year will be different, I will… Read More
April 15, 2018

4000 Twitter Followers Mega Giveaway Competition

in Blog
Celebrate this milestone with me by winning some kinky sextoys I am fast approaching 4,000 followers on Twitter and thought it would be nice to be able to celebrate this milestone achievement with a fantastic giveaway. Three amazing companies have stepped… Read More
Mar 02, 2018

I Am Reviewing The uFUC PRO v.2 Fucking machine

in Blog
I have just received another fucking machine from sexmachines.co.uk I am delighted to… Read More
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